Damn, I thought it was going to be WAY easier. Just like, front hug some fellas and chug a bottle of wine on your birthday.

I've read the HP series multiple times and haven't turned into a witch yet. How many more times do you think I need to read them??!

So they eat "emergency" food every day. If I was god I'd be like farm some shit you lazy weirdos. But that's just me.

The Hufflepuff girl is eating veggie bacon. I LOVE IT.

The best part of this line is that if you were following HP cannon, this conversation was actually happening on Harry's birthday which the Dursley's weren't acknowledging. It really just takes the WTF to new heights.

This is terrible but when I saw the Sarah Hyland piece I thought "Dyyyyyyyylan nooooooo"

Oh yeah, because Chris Brown and Sean Penn and even Emma Roberts have such a hard time dating and getting acting jobs.

The more depressing thing is that 9/11 became that moment. Sorry, I'm a real debbie downer today.

Even better!

Ugh fuck these people. I hope you're doing better and this didn't ruin your day. Just remember, tonight is new tv! You can make it :]

OBVIOUSLY Sir Elton John is the Queer Pope. Jeeze.

Wait. Is that Drop Dead Fred??! I haven't thought of this movie (the best movie) in YEARS.

I didn't call you hysterical at all, anywhere. I didn't even get close to it. Just wanted you to cool it a bit because I think we're on the same team and I think you're arguing with the wrong person.

Fuck this shit. I'm going to take the advice of Miranda Bailey and rise above but what a reductive, psuedo-intellectual piece of garbage.

YOU madam, are awesome. I haven't but I'm writing all of these down and will start binge watching as soon as I get out of this cube and into some comfortable pant-wear.

Whoa. You might want to take it down a notch considering I live in a major city and haven't driven in 5 years. I've seen more pedestrians get hit by cyclists who couldn't be bothered to stop at stop signs than traffic accidents. And yeah, I get that it's anecdotal but I wasn't building a national case of it, just …

If its two things I like, it's sass and BBC. Tell me you've watched Call the Midwife? I need to be able to discuss it with someone!

I like the cut of your jib and I've got an opening for a new show in my life. I'll trade you details for internet chocolate?

Yeah— this is great in theory I'd like to see some enforcement to make cyclists obey the rules of the road first.

Mommy, why is Harry Potter swearing at me??