“Both.” That is the only acceptable answer to that question.

My thoughts exactly. I’d add pull-ups to that list too.

#4! You always have to assume the room is bugged with video. That's why you masturbate under the covers. Every time. Also, that means that Jesus can't see you. Its bad enough that he watches you poop.

I always get two keys. They’ve never charged me more.

I put my empty hard side suit case about a foot from the door. It’s cheap luggage and poorly balanced, so, empty, it’s light enough to fall over easilyif the door is opened.

Umm, if it wasn't for drinking, I'm pretty sure my wife would have never gotten pregnant.

I’ve never been able to comprehend it. I try not to touch anything in the bathroom. I can’t imagine putting my bare feet on a floor covered in the piss of men and women from around the world.

That's because Obama is just barely to the right of Bush Sr.

I’d love to see the Venn diagram for Berniebros and Wilco fans. I’m picturing one single, perfect circle.

I would add one more distinction between developer and engineer: Math. I used to be a programmer verging on developer. I could pick up languages easily, construct frameworks, etc. But the real engineers, they have an understanding of the advanced mathematics required to write advanced algorithms, solve complex…

I’ll second the eating. I was in the same place - working out hard but hitting a plateau at certain weights. Then I started eating more (I too lost weight and I think it made me hyper-conscious of my diet). I’m amazed at the progress I’ve made in the month I’ve been eating more (especially more protein). It makes a…

What a whiny little fuck. “Mom, Rosy bruised my pussy!” My loving, kind, saint-like wife turns homicidal ever time she hears his voice.

Thanks. And congratulations on your big raise!

I’ve been promoted at my company three times in the last three years. Before that, I was stuck. What sparked things? I left. I took another job for six months. I didn’t like the company and came back to the old one, but in a different position. Something about the departure and return raised my visibility (and salary)…

It says the study was conducted on 18-89 year olds. I wonder if they stratified by age. I'm guessing that the sexual expectations of an 18 year old are much different from those of an 88 year old.

I read it too. It was very well-reasoned and, well, sensible. Essentially, sh just said, ‘let’s not tell grow people what to wear for Halloween.’ I agree. And her reasoning was that she didn’t feel she had the ability to draw an objective line about what’s acceptable and she was pretty sure no one else did either.

DO NOT volunteer to take notes. First, because no one actually reads that shit. And second, because you’re turning yourself into a secretary with nothing to offer to the discussion. It's a great way to downgrade your status.

Great advice. I want to break up with you from just reading this.

Sadly, I was 37. In 38 now. It’s going to be a long road.

I travel internationally about twice a month and another factor that I wasn’t aware of is the number of pages in your passport. Some countries require a certain number of blank pages to grant entry. Just in case, I’m going to have some pages added to my passport when my travel slows down at the end of the year.