Based on recent experiences and stories I have heard from other job seekers, I have become convinced that recruiting is the current refuge of people too dumb to do any other job.

Better make it less than 140 characters, just to be safe.

I’m a scientist, so I constantly have to convert back and forth between the metric system and freedom units.

Nothing says “I’m a Christian” louder than nonsensical intolerance, leaving your family on Christmas, to commit law breaking assholery bordering on homicidal rage!

I’m sorry, what did you think Mutually Assured Destruction meant? That was the whole point. Nuclear deterrence is all about the idea that if you attack, you won’t have a country left, even if you “win”.

A better representation would be the number of gun deaths by unlicensed gun owners vs. licensed owners. I think then you will get a better idea of where the problem lies.

Sorry, I’m too old and good grammar is too ingrained for me to use all the text speak that’s common now. I use correct words, I punctuate my sentences and I bitch constantly when spell check changes ‘wall’ to ‘bread.’ So if people think texts from me that they can read are cold and insincere, so be it.

lol, if the cat leaves as soon as it gets the chance, it’s not your cat is it? You were holding it captive, you weirdo.

thanks dad

All major religions are fucked up patriarchies! Just a reminder.

So to you, Pale Ale and India Pale Ale (not Indian Pale Ale) are the same thing? They are not.

“.....and FEMA has stacks of plastic coffins stored up for as soon as Obama’s martial law goes into effect and the UN troops start rounding up fat people, old people, white people, and Jews.”