Yes, those onions stacked between the pages are not going to cut themselves

Hmm. I want to watch this, but I also don’t want to get in the way of the movie theater employees who come in after the showing to clean up, because I’m sure I’ll be crying on the dirty floor of the theater.

Ahem!

Roald Dahl sure was right about one thing:

Hot take: Jeff Buckley’s cover of Hallelujah is the definitive. All other versions can go home and take a seat. This one can sit in the cold, dark, moldy basement.

They were usually pretty kind to each other, but they were funny with their “overall experience” ratings which was all you would really see them give. “I’m giving her wedding a 4/10. She looked so beautiful, the food was awesome, and I had the most fun ever. However, it was hot during the ceremony.”

Not going to lie, I was really proud to see our military up here in Canada tweet this:

I live in Canada, and every winter Subaru has these radio commercials which drive me crazy, about how you want all-wheel drive so you can get where you’re going in the snow.

there you go. keep denying the facts.

It really does go too far. Because only one of them is assured of health insurance in the event.

I’ll face shame him. He looks like a goddamn serial killer.

And tomorrow, May 9th, the Oklahoma 28th state house district is having an election. Steve Barnes is the Democrat. Remember, voting for Democrats -even at the state level!- is the strongest form of resistance.

Keep resisting! If any of y’all are from Montana, vote for Rob Quist for Congress on May 25th. Give Trump a big blue bruise in a red state!

Fuck them. Kids are the most important.

Imagine if video games were actual miniverses that, while an instance exists, the characters within possess some level of cognition. This is the video game equivalent of deboarding Mario for 13 hours, forcing him to run up and down the aisle, screaming “just-a kill-a me!”

An anecdote of why you can’t run government like a business. As told by Jamie Vollmer:

Donald: this is the deal, take it or leave it!

Never stop reminding Republicans that they had 7 years to come up with a replacement. 7 years.

Only $1500 away.

Tough shit. I’m tired of being Captain Save-a-Ho to the rest of the knuckle-dragging mouth-breathing country. It’s not MY job to drag you kicking and screaming into the 20th century.