Hunt’s is not an acceptable tomato product in my home. Any self-respecting cook knows that Contadina is the only acceptable national domestic brand.

See: Israel’s attitude towards Palestinians.

goddammit - that almost made me do a spit take.

Nothing good can come of Trump at the top of the pecking order.

That is precisely why I never replaced mine when it died 15 years ago.

Yeah that would fuck up my entire kitchen aesthetic!

I thank John Oliver for the fact that every time I think about him speaking I hear Gilbert Gottfried.

enslaved? Fuck her - she married him for his money and this is her penance. I have ZERO sympathy for her and her bandwagon Birther bullshit.

I have been saying this since Sandy Hook every time another shooting goes down and people scream for gun law reform (for about a week until the next outrage)

ahahahaha were you there? Because I WAS. I watched more than a few of my friends sucker punch nazis in SF to howls and cheers from the rest of us.

Yeah, anti abortion? That probably means you don’t agree with stem cell research. He’s the number for a decent funeral home. NEXT!

Since the mother is pushing 50, Imma say that 2 year old is a product of incest.

Goddammit.

JFC - the television personality currently in the White House is doing such a great job we should give it to the woman who unleashed Dr. Oz and Dr. Phil onto the world. Have we learned nothing?

Googled that.

I grew up in the area. When my dad was a kid the house had the original furniture in it. By the time I was a teenager (the 70s) that was gone, but we used to take the tour and try to get ‘lost’ so we could spend the night (we always got caught). Once the Japanese bought it and turned it into a crazy tourist Disneyland…

Fuck that’s where I am right now - mom seems fine to me on the phone (I live in another country) but siblings are telling me she’s fucked. Thanks for the heads up (I think).

Sweet potatoes are vile.

This, this, 1000x this.

No, you dolt - I was screaming.