I live in France where I typically do a pretty good job of assimilating but one day I just REALLY wanted fries with ketchup. The waiter legit said to me “No. We eat fries with mustard. I’ll bring you mustard.” And you know what? I ate my goddamn fries with mustard.

YES, YES, YEEESSSS!!

We used to have a TV show in the UK called worlds strictest parents. They would send really shitty teenagers to families in the middle of Africa, India, and other Asian countries to teach them to be thankful and how easy we have it. We should apply the same concept to shitty restaurant customers. Would be very…

My kids don’t eat green things.

I definitely would have said something. That said: once, when I was 13, I overheard some racist lady talking mad shit about Mexicans. (This was in a part of LA that was largely Hispanic.) Anyways, she also kept mentioning Jesus. Her husband kept saying, “but dear...”

Her way of speaking was reminding me of someone...then it clicked!

The phrase, “the customer is always right” has constructed an entire subset race of bitchy humans that think service workers are beneath them.

Seriously. Some woman went balls ass crazy on me over a garbage can in the street. I simply said to her, “I feel so bad for you. How sad must your life be that you are THIS upset over a garbage can.”

Customer: “You got it wrong...*employees appear to be talking to each other in another language for no more than three seconds* you know what? I’m really glad you two can talk to each other in whatever language it is that you’re speaking, but it’s really rude. And if you want to be polite to the customer, OK *employee…

I love idiots like this who don’t actually realize the United States has no official language

Why did no one in that restaurant say anything to that monster?

I can’t stand the whole “speak English in America” bullshit. There is no official national language! Plus it’s just a cover for racism.

I know kids are picky but I would be so humiliated if I ever said “MY CHILD DOESNT EAT GREEN FOOD!” that loudly in public.

“...and THAT’S why you should never be a racist, xenophobic, classist asshole.”

I am getting so sick of the whole “This is America, speak English” bullshit from these people. Especially when you walk into a presumably ethnic restaurant and then proceed to put your xenophobia on full display.

That’s what I do: When I want to see Americans speaking English, I go to a kebab shop.

As numerous YouTube commenters pointed out, she did not get the door right the first time.

It’s like the universe is creating incidents just for us, only way it could have been better is if she declared that her children were allergic to green.

#teamnoone