The year was 1948, the president was sideline siren Phyllis George, and everybody was doing a dance called the Nagurski Two-Step! [suddenly falls asleep, snoring]

The antidote to viewing Barkley's beer pong ineptitude (I know, I know, 2009 called & etc, it's still fun to watch):

Beer pong wasn't a thing when Sir Charles was at Auburn. Hell, I'm like a decade younger than he is and beer pong wasn't even a thing yet when I was in college. In our day, we played Quarters. What the hell happened to Quarters? I guess the coin-bouncing skills we worked to hard to acquire are now as obsolete as our…

Paging anyone who has a vote for the WWE Hall of Fame: we would like to buy your vote and subvert the process in an effort to pre-determine the winners.

Petrino-inspired rondelay:

When oh when will the NCAA wake up, smell the coffee, and at least allow Division I scholarship athletes to receive a gambling stipend?

Meh. I can't derive any detailed schadenfreude from this video. My resolution to laugh at these Auburn fans remains low.

"No, no, no — we did not say something racist! Someone else said something racist, and we repeated it. That's all."

RIP indeed, Eusébio. Being the first African-born player to star in the European leagues is a big fucking deal. 733 goals in 741 professional games is an astounding feat.

He was off ALL the sides, that's how offsides he was. Hence, "offsides."

Frowning Nagle.

Animated GIFs. Grainy, maddeningly endless-looping visual detritus that illuminate nothing. Animated GIFs were over in like, 2006... until Buzzfeed and Deadspin managed to re-animate* them via web saturation. Do the right thing, Deadspin, and bury those annoying web 1.0 turds for good this time.

He was damn good as Chicken George in Roots, too. One of the only things about that miniseries that holds up.

PLEASE go back to coaching, Gruden. For the sake of all of our ears. There are plenty of good announcers out there. I'm just sick for the guys who can no longer color commentate. Do the best you can to lose your job.

So, the 12-4 Niners are a wild-card and they get to play as visitors at 8-7-1 Green Bay next Sunday in a late game. Green Bay, who barely won a shitty division. Whatever.

T'aint as bad as it looks.

For the combatant on the receiving end, this incident gave a new definition to "butthurt."

The officers said they might not have arrested Puig had he not been so blatant about admiring his own speedometer as he drove.

He IS one of the world's best.

"But... the football... his groin... it works on so many levels!"