They're not racists; they're trolls. Racists hate/fear people of other races. Trolls hate everyone, and look for the easiest avenue to inflict discomfort on particular victims of the moment.

What's wrong, McCarthy? The rest of these poll results hurt you? Aww, it hurts?!? NO QUITTERS IN FOOTBALL! SUCK IT UP AND GET BACK OUT THERE, YOU GODDAMN PANSY!

Am I the only one who finds this a bit oversold (even, dare I say, Lincecumesque)? If a soft clearance header goes near Ibra in 3 yards of space with an unobstructed look at the goal, this is what I for one expect to happen.

Still no word on why MLS needs 21 teams

So... A Flock of Seagulls were all over his dock all afternoon, and D-Wade videotaped it? How did TMZ miss this?

Threatening to poison the patrons of Citifield attending Mike Piazza's HOF Induction through their concession foods

And Frank Gifford would've said "It's nice to be remembered."

Cue the usual grousing about football espionage.

Wait'll they find out it's a carrier pigeon sent from the Tampa Bay Buccaneers locker room.

Participants should dress "appropriately" to be drilled in the running of such formations as the Citi® Regulatory End-Around.

The equipment manager survived; however, Santa Fe will don black armbands at their next match in memory of the five pink highlighter pens whose lives were lost.

One witness told other fans he knew the suspects personally, but when questioned by security officials he said he didn't know what they Vertonghen about.

CHEEKS' SWEETS FREAKS, MO THROWS CLOTHES

Over the course of an hour, we saw 477 fans wearing jerseys not belonging to the Vikings or Steelers. Of those, every other NFL team was represented, except the Chiefs. (Although a later lap around the stadium did turn up a single Jamaal Charles fan.)

Hey, let's all take a step back and recognize that FIFA has to stay competitive. They can't just let the NCAA and the NFL leave them behind in the race for the World's Most Corrupt Sports Organization title.

Exactly, so it's not like Di Canio gives that salute in order to say "Ave Caesar!"

Nevertheless, Iniguez insists his off-season training with Pete Rose was worth it.

Irony supplement: As part of the 49ers defense that gave up 27 points to the Colts on Sunday, Aldon Smith couldn't hit a tree.

No TD, Franco. Joe Paterno's reputation clearly hit the ground before you picked it up.

Mmm... baaaacon...