Can we leave New Hampshire behind too?

I think we should petition to have New England secede from the US.

The thought has crossed my mind, but then we get pence.

btw, I’ve become really religious. I pray several times a day that a vengeful God give Trump a massive stroke.

I want some way for the Northeast to float out to sea (but not Pennsylvania; fuck you Pennsylvania!) Bugs, we need you desperately.

I hate it when my therapist tells me to do breathing exercises.

I felt such incredible pride watching her concede—never have I admired her more than her confronting the greatest wall of adversity any of us has ever faced in public life. She was truly presidential through each oncoming wave of adversity and malice, starting 18 months ago. She WAS the president during her speech,…

- I waste a lot of time walking into rooms and wondering why I went into said room.

My cat Chillvester wore the same costume for Halloween this year!

My cat Colin is no stranger to meeting famous people, recently, he spoke at an Annual Navy Event he was in high spirits:

From the way his tail is lashing, I would guess that Bob is seriously considering sinking his claws into that hella expensive lace.

SEE

FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK YOU!!!FUCK…

Anne Frank, a historical figure murdered by Nazis.

Is Beyonce really on par with Anne Frank?

Oh Megyn Kelly, how I simultaneously despise and cheer for you

Please let this election end already. It just feels so weird rooting for Megyn Kelly for something.

I mean seriously though? At the end of the day we’re talking about a highly produced, 3-minute music video that was churned out of a profit machine modernly designed to capture views, incite tween worship, and generate revenue for the ultra wealthy.

Blah blah blah I’m happy for them but those quotes are god awful attempted poetry. Like real bad. Her heart is full of deep ocean minerals? What does that even mean??

My wife and I recently lost our twin boys, Anton and Colin, at 20 weeks gestation. They were handsome, they were healthy, but my wife had an unforeseen and undiagnosed incompetent cervix despite being on bedrest for most of the 20 weeks, and we were advised that we need to deliver or we would lose three lives instead…