New phone, who dis

Wait, so buying an unreliable German car is bad?

I enjoyed this article. It was informative without being pedantic, and short enough to read on the can and not have the wife shout down “are you playing with yourself in there or what?!”

I was gonna drive the Aventador, but then I got high

It’ll probably look better in a different color. And it’ll have a much nicer interior and better reliability than the Subaru.

Nah, I think even your 20 year old self would have thought that. This thing is ridiculous.

my wife was having trouble buying lotions because they either make her break out, or were too expensive, or had to be ordered online, or whatever.

His cock is almost as black as his heart.

Bringing the deep thoughts into this one. You win!

But what if you are drifting, do the side windows turn into windshields?

Has anyone questioned Hillary yet?

I mean, we can wait a few months until the emails leak, but I feel we should probably find out more ASAP.

The lack of apostrophes bother me more than the lowkey racism.

Clown shoe! I agree it is a gorgeously ugly car.

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cute! reminds me of a lil black dachshund

Porsche be like:

Ah, Bernie is 85? That explains why he looks like Andy Warhol’s rotting corpse.

This seems like an odd route to take to try and raise the money to finish building the Olympic venues.

Just waiting for some horrifying woman’s cloyster pics to show up in response to this new version of dick pics.