Literally how I would answer every one of these questions. You know, if I were “Mariah-famous/talented”. These aren’t diva answers, they are, “I have no time for fake, air-kissy, bullshit” answers. Respect.

watching these people, therefore making them relevant, is one of the most embarrassing things we, as humanity, have done.

And it all started with a mom, a sex tape and a Dream

Watch the attempt of these people to be relevant is one of the most embarrassing things we, as humanity, have to go through.

Just like Walgreens: “Oh we could donate a few million to charities but don’t you feel good that we gave you this opportunity of adding a dollar to your purchase?”

Agreed. It’s incredible how quickly a school can turn around when they have an AD who’s not impulsively harassing every woman in sight.

Before we go any further: Southwest is definitely not beneath me. United and their garbage are definitely beneath me. Fuck United.

The damage was done long before Obama told Putin to stop. The damage was done when the media decided Clinton’s win was assured and that she should be dogged relentlessly for every email revelation, real or imagined. We can complain about Russia all we want, but Russians didn’t force the New York Times to dedicate…

Jackass, actually

I still can’t imagine that he did anything that bad on the plane. Maybe I’ve been bamboozeled by his looks and charisma, but it’s hard for me to picture him being anything other than an affable stoner.

Since Brad was a known pot user when they got together, it would be weird if the tests were just for marijuana.

You know what they say:

He’s a fuckin’ joke.

A man who has delusions about Planned Parenthood “destroying generations of African Americans” has no problems working with an industry that is actually destroying the lives of Africans - O.K.

Wife and I went to Macys and did the whole Registry party thing they throw. We gave them a bum email account I use, filled up on their snacks and drinks, scanned a bunch of stuff we knew we were never getting and left with a full stomach. Never told anyone about that registry. Wife and I lived together for several…

Many vestigial parts of the wedding industry hate millennials.

I suspect I know exactly what he’s doing: Trolling 300 million people.

And that Bernie Sanders voted for?

You mean the crime bill that Joe Biden wrote?

If only Kanye had joint ventured with the Trump Foundation.