I have literally no idea who these people are or why they keep smelling their fingers or why this woman abuses eyebrow pencil so badly.

Riri taught you well.

It’s uncanny, right?

Let’s do this...

This is all very well-written and researched, but a couple of things:

This weekend an unvaccinated six year old boy was the first person to die of diptheria in 28 years in Spain. His parents rejected getting him vaccinated and now he’s dead. A vaccinated child is much better then a dead one.

When you give rights to the minority, you take rights away from the majority—-simple logic.

I LOOOOOOOOOOOVe the fact that the more progressive we get, the more and more these people sound like absolute LOONEY TOONS.

illeagls sounds like an avian themed hip hop group

Stop, please...I can only get so erect.

I’ll tell the story, but read at your own risk.

It always comes down to this.

Just make rocket ship cookies and then she'll have nothing to complain about.

“You put tits on cookies”

I lucked out with my oldest but when my youngest was in 4th grade, I met a woman like this. At the beginning of the school year she took over and that should have been a sign. Eh, I thought. Come Valentine’s Day I realized I should have protested a bit harder about this head case being classroom mom. Apparently my…

Frankly we should make them clutch coal, that way the pressure would make diamonds and we could end blood diamonds forever!

Since I was 5 I’ve identified as the Batman. It doesn’t matter that I’m a 30 something black male. People should respect my identity and address me as Batman.

I see myself as transcorporeal. This physical form is just an affectation of biological circumstance. I really identify as a ghost.

“Oh, wait, THAT’S what an abortion is? I thought it was a maintenance procedure, like getting your car detailed.”