I originally processed that line as “Jerry Springer denies Kesha a Hug,” and I was very confused as to why she wanted to hug Jerry Springer.

Or both. They can both be amazing in different ways.

I’d put money on Howard Schultz running.

We’re heading in the right direction. I dig it.

As a childless person, it would be so easy for me to sit back and be like, “obviously they need to let go,” but I can’t imagine what this would feel like. Logical and rational are easy when it’s not you.

Right? And I had my job interview for my dream company in the morning on the 9th so I couldn’t even drink my feelings. Got the job, though.

Hush with this or I’ll start crying and I can’t do that because my mascara is on point today.

I resisted the urge to chop off all my hair and my hair stylist told me he was proud of me for it. We’ve worked too hard on this mess of hair of mine to go chopping it all off and starting over again.

Gal’s dress is a thing I need. Now.

And does he have any kind of go fund me that people can contribute to for this legal fees?

Now I’m hungry.

TBH, I spend half of my drunk life wanting chicken nuggets. However, as a goddamn adult, I make due with more pretentious food while dreaming of chicken nuggets and BBQ sauce.

Which doesn’t even make sense because why would you not have a dog when someone else will do all the poop related work for you???

I’m drunk and don’t want to be associated with Trump... but now I want some chicken nuggets.

If they weren’t the decision makers on this, you’re absolutely right. I was making the assumption that they were.

And/or hella push up bra.

Can you imagine how horrifying it would be to have your sexual abuse become public? Like, if I showed up at work some day and saw coverage of my rape posted everywhere, I can’t imagine how traumatic it would be. Is especially bad given that they were raised to think their purity is their only value.

Also, did the beef between Taylor and Nicki get restarted at some point that I didn’t know about?

Cool story.