Let’s be real, I doubt she reads the transcript, ‘cos readin’s for pansy-ass libruls! But otherwise I totally agree.

I’m a litigator. Sometimes I’ll do oral argument before the Court and think, “shit, that felt like rambling. I bet I sounded so dumb. I must do better next time.” And then I get the transcript back and I’ve spoken eloquently throughout it. Comparatively, I imagine Palin is like “nailed it” after a speech and then…

Oh man, it just keeps getting better. I never ever ever want Rob and Chyna to break up.

I was a little taken aback by that too, then I read that he - and he alone - exposed this to about a million and a half people who might otherwise never have seen it, and who, predictably, then spread it further. That’s more than being a garbage person, that’s causing real harm.

Do you also get the most incredulous faces? Like WHOA I AM A MAN YOU SEE ME RIGHT?

Lord have mercy, Beasts of No Nation was incredible, that man is an incredible actor. You are not.

“their place of fitness” I'm going to start referring to everything like this. The Mexican restaurant is now my place of tacos.

And Emma Thompson:

All the pygmy sloth hugs in the world for you, my friend.

After all this time, Alan.

“Always.”

It seems extreme that simply recalling the first name — while otherwise using the feminine pronoun throughout, and never calling today’s Caitlyn Bruce instead — would be “transphobic.” It’s getting to egg-shelly around here.

All I see is this

Yeah, they didn’t “yuck it up like a couple of old racists”, he pretended to do that so that he could deliver the line. The entire point of that bit was that he wasn’t sorry at all and he actually doubled down on the idea that Gibson is a piece of shit. There’s a lot to hate Gervais for, but this is isn’t it. As you…

Hittin’ her with the brows, even when she can’t catch ‘em.

I...fully support a kid not getting an iPhone till after they’re 15

I always like it when my ethnic group is compared to Miller Lite, don’t you?

How does plaid even register in carbonite? It’s not like there are physical differences in the pattern. Why do I care about this?

Yes, but George, when you ruin your children, sometimes the state has to take them away from you for their own welfare.

HIS WIFE WORKS AT GOLDMAN SACHS I FEEL LIKE I'M TAKING CRAZY PILLS