I’m pretty happy to see the counts up on menus. I’m all for sitting down and having a meal I know for a fact is over half my calories that day. But sometimes that’s not my goal. Sometimes I’m just at a restaurant because it’s easier than cleaning the kitchen while the kids are awake, and I’m just trying to figure out…

God I loved Signs! It scared me to death.

≥≥Megyn Kelly joked that she could have just given the motorcade a thumbs-down and avoided this whole mess.≤≤

I’m still tryin’ to make my way past the fact that the child’s name is Hennessy...

It stresses me out that only 21% of people are stressed about climate change.

The baby from the Dinosaurs TV show was a fucking asshole. He absolutely is not the best baby, he is one of the worst babies. It’s all about him, he assaults Earl on a regular basis and demand that even after doing such, you must love him. Well I don’t and no one should and I’m glad that show ended with them all dying.

I’m not a piece of shit for not wanting to have herpes.

Nope, lol. Not everyone.

Claire, you have once again done us all proud with the rightness of your thinking. The candy apple’s sole use is providing a frame of reference for sports car colors.

There should be a law that says you can’t comment on the internet until you’re 30. Umtil then, you need to shut up and listen so you don’t write ignorant shit like what you just wrote.

I think you mean “one episode.”

Probably a good thing you wouldn’t hire them, I wouldn’t want to be hired by a company that doesn’t understand humor.

wait you started eating less than half as much and you’ve been losing a lot of wait? that’s crazy.

Rule#1:

Star this so it goes to the top pls. Do not scroll down; some asshat posted pictures of decapitated heads and mutilated corpses and some other asshat raised it out of the grays.

🙁 that stuff freaks me out!!!!

Right before I turned 21 I moved to a new city, transferred colleges, and got an apartment by myself. I picked a place out on the third story of a rambling old Victorian mansion - a modest studio with white metal cabinets from the 1950's and a rusted fire escape which always gave me bad feelings. It was metal, and…

That’s because Miracle Whip is an abomination.

Also, maybe you married the wrong person? When that happens we often look for signs of trouble anywhere we can find it. Think about it.

I don’t watch this show, but the realness of this scenario choked me up. Sixteen years ago my daughter was stillborn at full-term and some of my most comforting “memories” are the moments where I am feeling broken by the loss and I put her back into my narrative. I see her in the passenger seat of my car as I drive,…