I am just that much of a bitch.

I absolutely agree but while I am stranded here doing phone interviews I have to write something. That’s my job. So I did this. I’m certainly not planning a series on my coldness or my feelings.

SnowMachine not snowmobile.

At least the memes will be positive...

This *is* the rule of law. This is literally why the electoral college exists. As Alexander Hamilton said, the electoral college is designed to ensure “that the office of President will never fall to the lot of any man who is not in an eminent degree endowed with the requisite qualifications.”

Part of the electoral college’s duty is to make sure Americans don’t elect someone who bamboozled them. The founding fathers didn’t trust people who fall for social media hoaxes on the regular, so they said once the people vote, these electors will have the final say to confirm those votes, or to check perhaps a…

My fervent wish is for this whole goddamn shitshow to explode the existence of the electoral college altogether.

If they were people capable of self-awareness, this would be so goddamn embarrassing.

Now I must prepare and consume two grilled cheese sandwiches, to settle the butter versus mayo question. The sacrifices I make for science.

Me too. Now I’m broken for that poor kid.

I’ve read all the reasons why people can legit forget their kids are in the car. Still don’t get it. I moved halfway across the country this summer and blasted across three states with hardly any stops (except overnight in a pet-friendly motel) because my two cats were with me. If I had to stop to rest/eat, I did it…

Baseball is the only sport that actually looks like America.

I don’t know who said this, but somewhere on Twitter I saw “Jill Stein is the friend who ruins your wedding but shows up for you during the divorce.”

Exactly. “Under his/her watch” has always struck me as utterly arrogant, as if it’s our job to hall monitor conflicts around the world and then intervene when they get messy. Even if we wanted to be, we are NOT the world’s cop, babysitter, whatever. Have we not learned a fucking thing over the past 50 years? Nation…

Damn! Wait, is that allowed? These guys are GOOD. Wait, BAAAAD?

Hello Kinja this is a formal request to change the stars to pentagrams on this site. Thank you for your consideration.

#IMWITHluciFER

What can be done to combat this kind of thinking? I have immediate family members that just flatly refuse to grapple with facts-- when they’re confronted with them, they just say, “I don’t believe that”. It feels like democracy hangs on us figuring out a way to bring these people back into the realm of reality, but I…

“I’m putting all my energy into Xmas”