ESA’s entry in the contest:

Aren’t we all sort of lucky to be alive given the types or cars we were in as kids and how we rode around in them?! My and my brother would sit in the back of the station wagon in the very back looking out at cars and playing back there! No seat belts, no kids seats, nothing. It was normal back then. I can’t imagine…

My dad was trading in two vehicles, an X5 and Ram 1500. He drove the X5 to the dealership and I was supposed to follow in the Ram.

I was once pulled over in the California desert doing 115 mph. I was coming back from a wedding, and at the wedding had spilled an entire glass of whiskey on my suit jacket. Cop pulled me over, smelled alcohol, asked me to get out of the car to do a number of alcohol tests — stand on one leg, close your eyes and touch…

My last employer crushed my spirit and my will to live. What’s that worth?

I can confirm that that Fiskar is awesome. That’s what I use and I’m Canadian

I suspect it may be a Green Machine.

He got all huffy.

Film gets made, everyone loves it and it does well, so of course decades later it will be remade to cash in again. It’s almost like it’s the...

“A wizard is never late, nor is he early, he arrives precisely when he means to”- Elon Gandalf Musk

You must be typing that from work ;)

Serious question: I’m in my early 40s. I used to love the Simpsons and Futurama, but they either got less funny or I just got old. I still have a pretty stupid sense of humor, but am not at all into weed culture. Will I like Adventure Time?

Kudos to you for finding that somewhere in there. Made it a few pages and died of dysentary.

I'm just in a meme mood today

Mad props.

Have I got a bridge to sell.

Go home, hug her, find your smile, and all is right in heaven.

Obviously that’s Matt Damon in the suit. YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST FOLKS

That’s such bullshit. Norway has supposedly one of the best healthcare systems. LOOK AT WHAT YOUR HEALTHCARE SYSTEM HAS DONE, NORWAY! LOOK AT IT! #thanksobama