I had a version of this happen to me. After two round of IVF (and 40 pounds of weight gain, thank you hormones), my ex and I had two boys and girl, complete with genetic testing and plans to go through surrogate route for birth. However, he was hesitant (thankfully) and we eventually broke up.

I was torn as to what I…

Control and forcing her to keep him in her life. She’s very publicly moved on from him and sounds like he doesn’t like that. If the gossip rags are right, he was a controlling asshole throughout their relationship.

I get that these are fertilized embryos and all...but seriously, what would this guy want with them? Couldn't he just go and find another person to impregnate? It really seems like he's just doing this to publicly smear his ex and embarrass her by hashing out a bunch of personal information.

Why do all the headlines for all four of these stories sound like they were written by the cunt punch sorority girl?

I always think about Skin-So-Soft and how it used to be used to prevent Mosquito bites. I would put it on, then promptly get bit in the places where I didn’t apply it.

Seriously. I’ll admit, I’m still pretty preppy (non-ironic headbands!), but not really the right shape for J. Crew anymore at all. I just want to find cute basics that actually go over my hips! You guys remember what hips are, right?

It’s not just that the prices have skyrocketed, it’s that the quality has tanked. In college I would splurge on one of their cashmere v-necks a year and gradually built up a nice little collection that lasted most of a decade. Two of the last three sweaters I bought there arrived with holes in them. Also 98% of their…

Wow. What does it say that I’m honestly not even surprised by this? When I first heard of this story, I actually imagined the minutes after the shooting consisting of officers smiling and yucking it up with one another, with a sprinkling of attaboys and back pats thrown in for seasoning. I know that there are people…

If Betsey Johnson can still do perfect cartwheels at 72, age is truly nothing but a number.

It is not up to the owner where he wants to play. Any relocation has to be approved by a vote of all the NFL’s owners, and it requires 3/4 to vote in favor of it. The NFL, and all leagues really, have essentially said that if teams can get new stadiums built where they are currently located, relocation will not be…

In my fantasy world, the top of the list of problems is “She’s Too Damn Conservative.” Also, in my fantasy world, Biggie is still alive and making relevant music and everyone has a tiny domesticated teacup bear as a pet.

There was a part in the interview when she said something about not seeking him out, how she had caught him staring at her many times, and how he thought she looked like a movie star of something. And she says “I knew he was trouble” kind of giggling. Shades of Humbert Humbert, blaming the child.

I’m also waiting for Deadspin to condemn the actions of my next door neighbor, who is clearly an a-hole. It saddens me that Deadspin’s silence could be interpreted as condoning this boor’s behavior.

Just a quick suggestion - go to minor league baseball games! All the benefits of watching professional baseball, but at a fraction of the price, even at the AAA clubs.

When you're in the concession line, for Christ's sake look up at the menu so you're ready to order when it's your turn. Do NOT wait until you get to the front, then thoughtfully stroke your chin while murmuring to no one in particular, "Now...what...do...I...want...?"

Baseball, too. There are lots of breaks. You don't have to get ice cream when Harvey has two strikes on Harper.

Do not root for such a team.

Fuck Philly.

At a hockey game: wait for a stoppage in play to leave/return to your seat. Thanks.

Sneaking in some foodstuffs is okay, but don't be ridiculous about it.