They debated killing him and then blaming it on drug dealers, but decided that was too old school.

The Cardinals have lost 22 games. Jorge Soler’s number is 68. Michael Wacha’s number is 52.

“The most absurd thing about that conclusion is that Harvey looks exactly like countless other thick-bodied pitchers who have thrived in the major leagues.”

Oddly enough, I saw Mike Tyson walking around the streets of Las Vegas the other day wearing a t-shirt that said “Malformed Greasy Brandwhore.”

Odor: “Hey, man. How’d the date go last night?”

A chimp could have drafted Harper and Strasburg, and wouldn’t have signed Werth, Zimmerman, or Scherzer. That means add $462M to the $450M and you get nearly a billion dollar chimp.

That wasn’t his first...

No, it doesn’t. Pointing out “here’s a cool play from a minor league baseball game” is a vastly different way of writing than, “Kamara must be a monumental shithead if he is that good (in MLS)...”

This write-up wasn’t terrible (in Screamer).

Do all soccer/football articles in other countries constantly discuss the relative merits of their league?