You’re an April baby just like me. That kid at the store joked that my birthday was one day after his. I told him he was probably responsible for World War II.

Look let’s just leave it at judicial robes and let things be let..

Yes yes, it’s a real hardship to find out that both Sanders AND Biden are (allegedly) creeps.

Goddamn you Kinja and your bullshit format—*grumble*

It is amusing that nobody, including myself has ever heard of Dark Souls 2.

I will 1-up as I walked into my building and saw, there in the free box, a sealed copy of Mass Effect 3.

The future is that you are walking.

You’re dealing with Heather. I’m the least of your worries.

Yeah it was 4. I haven’t logged in to MGS5 in a year...oh god..

Not like tossing monopoly money onto the field. I was at that game. You could buy a bread-weiner and a warm bottle of liquid for under ten dollars!

Screw lego I want a plushie destroyer!!

Kill me now.

Dear Heather you’re just way too kind and decent for this sorta thing because nothing makes a person feel bigger than just shoving their razor sharp edge into somebody else’s gob!

I’m so old I forgot to how to, like, favorite this article thingy, it’s not the flame icon, it’s not the speech balloon thing..let me get my glasses!

Best flight of my life was with a friend who asked the air chief (Birender Singh Dhano) if we could move to the exit aisle while they de-iced the plane. Ah legroom.

“Another day another seventy-six cents.”

If you want to get really cynical you can always argue that these damn kids these days have quite the world-ending wave staring them in the face. Most of us in our 30's and 40's will see it but they’ve got to get to work. They don’t have time to waste with your Selkirk and your Wallout, youse kids needs to build a…

Oh yes! You’re probably already dug-in but —>

*jaw quivering, fingers quavering* Y-you are telling me *shudder* that lego *eye-twitch* has an Ion Frigate? Is that what you are telling me?