Indeed. I restrict my badmouthing to Volkswagen and Comcast.

Surfs a flaming Suburban into a lake. Leaps from the blazing inferno... and holds his nose like a little girl before he hits the water.

Isn’t that a Subaru Crosstrek? :P

I think it’s a Crosstrek, Imprezas don’t have the plastic molding above the wheels.

There was one the exact same color in front of my favorite restaurant. I was admiring it and a dude walked up and asked me if it was mine. I said that’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me

If you're really happy about your car's reliability in the first 15,000 miles, you've bought an unreliable car.

“I’ve had this thing 8 hours and not a problem! Except for that one thing, but that was covered by warranty.”

Would you like some wood to knock on?

15 thousand miles?! Slow down, you’re using up all the fancy too fast.

Your wife’s car isn’t crap because it cost $34K. Your wife’s car is crap because it’s an Escape.

what

I can tell you that the trains and buses do smell like pineapple. Rotting, moldy pineapple.

This isn’t as big a problem for new cars as it is for USED CARS. When shopping for new, a stock photo can work just fine. They’re all basically the same and in the same condition. But every used car is different. Pictures are crucial. Particularly when looking for a car with a manual transmission... because as you…

I would LOVE to find an FC Fire Vehicle

I’ve always thought those cars sounded like mooing cows. Any time I see one in traffic I start mooing along. When I see them at autocrosses I call them sports cows, which has a bit of double funny because the Z and Gwhatever are more than a little zaftig.

It’s really cute how you Z and Infiniti guys think those cars sound good.

Well, to purchase one, the average guy probably has to beg permission from his wife first and explain how she will enjoy it too.

So many memories. Fuck ICE and NEMESIS. El Nino was the shit.