Or that San Francisco movie about the dead lady and the Golden Gate Bridge.

If so, I would indeed be constantly amused.

He was mostly silent, but once in a while he would shake his head, smile and say "I'm drunk."

True story: I once got drunk with this guy, and you know what? He was a really boring drunk.

I have a friend in the Academy, and he's not horrible at all. He is racist, though. Also, he kills little girls and wears their skin.

"Let's make it vaguely sexual, but in a creepy, off-putting way. Also, make sure there's some volcano stuff."
– Björk, on every creative endeavor of her career

"Disorder"… "Digital"… "Atmosphere"… But definitely not "Love Will Tear Us Apart". Good song, but atypical of the band's style and vastly overplayed. It's like Joy Division's "How Soon Is Now".

Did you hear about the Polish guy that NBC hired? They said "Tell us what hit TV series to remake and we'll remake it." So the Polish guy says, "Oh, I've got one: The Decalogue."

Billy Crystal is a constant reminder of why men over 50 should just ditch the Grecian Formula and go gray.

No, it's All Children Devil's Children.

Can't they just dig up John Candy and put him in blackface?

Or, really, anywhere on the face.

Great bar bet: Tell people that you can prove that Dukakis actually won in 1988. After bets are made, show the clip of Olympia's Oscar speech and laugh, "I didn't say which Dukakis. Boom!" You'll be the least-liked person in the room, but whatever.

I bought 50 million tickets for opening weekend, just to spite your comment.

Some band in Boston tried to do it, but it came out Wicked Lame.

Interplanet Janet.

I'm still trying to wrap my head around Mennonites!

Whoever wrote the original song "Ah! vous dirais-je, Maman" in 1761 must be trebly pissed.

Pshaw. Let's talk about the REAL soundalikes:
"What Child Is This?" and "Greensleeves".
"My Country, 'Tis of Thee" and "God Save the King".
"The Star-Spangled Banner" and "To Anacreon in Heaven".

Still waiting for Walter Jr.'s Millions, coming in 2016.