It's definitely a valid use of the technology—bar viewership isn't exactly a small audience. My dream would be for just a SLIGHTLY interactive upgrade to the TV interface where you could turn on or off whatever on-screen graphics you want. Then everybody could tailor the viewing experience to their preferences. It's…

Yeah, this is an astute point, Tits. There is a TON of shit that has been added to sports broadcasts in the past decade or so for the benefit of bar-watching. The silly on-field down-and-distance stripes are another example of this (the "3RD & 5" things that splash across the empty part of the field before the play,…

You're so nice. Everybody's fine—I suspect this is just the latest dumb excuse from the idiotic Block & Tackle research department for why they messed up so many of my beautiful picks AGAIN.

I think he'll straighten it out. He's definitely in a slump, but the team also got rid of its legendary offensive line coach and then proceeded to ditch one of its longest-tenured and most accomplished linemen (who may have been losing a step, but still). In retrospect it's clear the Pats got a little too bold and…

You were dazzled by their alluring punctuational curves

Ha, believe me, I was watching! And it is indeed noted in the column.

I'd love to, and I'm psyched that you'd like to see such a thing on AVC. Alas, I only have time for football right now, but with time, we might recruit a couple of writers to cover other sports.

They are, because this way they sell more new phones.

"They only need to support the protocol" is theoretically correct, but that's not how CDMA carriers function in the U.S. CDMA "unlocking" isn't quite the liberation that GSM unlocking is, because a CDMA device's electronic serial number/mobile equipment ID still has to be in a carrier's database before they'll…

Just a weird coincidence

We tasted them, but that part of the video was really boring, so the video editor cut it out. Sorry, I should have mentioned that in the writeup!

I think my torso is regular-sized, although now I'm not sure! In any case, the other 80 percent is Monday through Thursday.

Amazing, and frighteningly believable.

As long as your avatar is well-dressed, which he certainly is, that is all that matters on the Internet.

Ha, it actually was Friday, and I don't dress up on Friday because that way I do 20% less ironing. So, yes!

I'm afraid it is, colonel. Sorry to disappoint.

That's a good idea! Maybe as an occasional MOP bonus segment.

Sure thing. Sorry about that! Auto-play videos ARE a dick move; I would never do that on purpose.

Can you tell me which videos auto-played for you? That shouldn't be happening.

Sorry about that, Nick. We've corrected the post. Thanks for creating these cool images!