Not only did I reach this level as a pre-teen, I now do the majority of the cooking for Thanksgiving (and Christmas), including the Turkey (we sous vidin’ this year bitches), and nobody fucks with my mac and cheese, not even Auntie Janet (who is not related to me at all), who has had the best mac and cheese.

I swear I love being black. Damn. I do.

I remember my mom encouraged me one year to make duck and bring that to the Thanksgiving gathering. I made two. My uncles were clowning me about bringing that to dinner because it was weird. But when it was all done, they ate it all. I can’t even remember if I was able to try the thing I brought. If I did, I only was…

Same! LOL I was thinking I didn’t go through no levels I just was. It was probably legacy because my Moms throws down and they just assumed....

Level IV - Allowed in the kitchen

White guy; black wife. When we were dating I invited her and her kids over to Thanksgiving dinner. I was so proud I made a turkey, stuffing, potatoes and a few veggies.

I would buy to that album.

“Check and Mate.”

My favorite is when they bring up hip-hop or something sports related when you’re talking about a completely unrelated subject. Uh, what the fuck does Kendrick Lamar have to do with Belgian Waffles, Jan?

We once had a petting zoo visit the library and they had snakes and spiders to show the kids. One of the handlers was walking along the line of children with an ENORMOUS jumping spider in a box. I turned to my colleague and said “If it’s a jumping spider shouldn’t the box have a lid?” At that moment the spider decides…

THIS IS MY ACTUAL NIGHTMARE

Did she need a face transplant because I would have clawed my own fucking face off

When I was a baby, my mom had me in a carrier as she went into the shed to check on something. She pulled the cord to the lightbulb and looked up to see a HUGE wolf spider perched directly above her face. She froze as long as she could but finally had to move because I was fussing...and the spider instantly dropped…

.......Like a face hugger from the Alien movies........

In 1989, my godmother was taking a shower, when she looked up and saw a huntsman spider roughly the size of a dinner plate right above her head. She thought, ‘no worries, I will just calmly and quietly finish up this shower before he has a chance to move.’ Right at that moment, the Newcastle earthquake stuck, rattling…

We would have also accepted “I’m thankful for term limits.”

“I’m thankful for Robert Mueller.”

Is Lena Dunham bad for feminism? Yes

Good luck on that since you aren’t even equating the value of Black feminist voices, the Root and other Black folks to that of your own. You’re calling us prejudiced because we don’t see the world as you see it.