I saw some commercials recently with her and Peele planning a wedding, that was real? The wedding, not the commercials.

Well if comic collectors want to be seen as socially acceptable they just have to start rioting and setting fires every time their favorite superhero dies

The linked logo is obviously for the band "Shitty Tree"

A nerd is just someone fanatically obsessed with something. If you read a ton of books to the point that you get in heated arguments over literature: you're a nerd. If you paint yourself in your home team's colors and watch football religiously: you're a nerd. If you have a project car or two, and are a die-hard Ford…

Reading makes you live longer because you stay inside away from all the dangerous things in the outdoors, like bears, and sunlight! Unfortunately, it also causes your chances of being crushed to death by a falling stack of books to rise sharply.

You get used to it honestly. At this point for me the physical discomfort is outweighed by the social and psychological comfort. Really the worst part about it is putting the stupid thing on in the morning… But at least I look more like they way I feel. And hey, I only have to wait 9-10 months before I qualify for…

As someone who binds daily, I don't blame you one bit

Sounds terrible

JAAAAAHH!!!
RASTAFARIANISM!!!!!!!!!

It's like my absolute favorite Lonely Island song, Ras Trent. I played it for my Jamaican grandmother and she was in tears laughing.

The only reason they say "rude" is because they heard a Jamaican guy say it once and they don't realize it has a different connotation

Would you believe I've never seen a single episode?

Anonymous cyberbullies hack some kids emoji toaster, harassing them into committing suicide(by taking the toaster into the tub of course)

The important question is whether or not I can get dickbutt toast.

They're saying "you're right, but I don't personally care(because I'm an ass)"

Seeso she-show: watch, we implore

It's a service you subscribe to "so" you can "see"

It's called the "male gaze" because there are far more male directors than female. If it was found overwhelmingly in lesbian films and tv, it would be called the "lesbian looky-loo".

Yeah she's always great on CBB, she and Aukerman have a really wonderfully bizarre chemistry

Maybe that's how he excels at improv, since he doesn't know what the next line is going to be