I want him to date Chuck, solely because "Chughead" would be a nicely multilevel portmanteau.

No. "Face butter," on the other hand…

I won't date hot women in the future, either!

Cutthroat Island. Have never let my friend forget he picked that one, and never shall.

A spiritual healer, an "obnoxious and wealthy hotel magnate," and a Duplass. Sounds like there's a soup pot that's got my bladder's name written all over it.

Well, yeah, but Vivaldi's the guy who killed their parents.

Well, I'm gonna sculpt a giant statue of Goliath in full teabagging posture, straddling Michelangelo's statue. It's spatial interaction and recontextualization, you see.

My favorite was the columnist who said "if rainbow unicorns existed and gave live birth, this would be the placenta."

Qwghlm. For the ladies.

Ha! We've got nuns. Frankly, I don't like these new guys' chances.

Say what you like about the Rev, but he always gave LOVE fighting odds against HATE.

If they'd just focus all their energy and attention on LaBeouf, I think society could maybe accommodate them.

I remember him in the original Clash of the Titans. Quite a career, that. R.I.P. indeed.

[Tries bsl05's pechuga]
"Hmm … smoky, fruity, and something … trollopy?"

I'm retiring to Gormenghast.

I'm gonna go out on a limb and say that, if the artist had worked in some sort of covert anti-Muslim message, far more poop would've hit the fan, and its spatter radius would put the current uproar to shame. Which is an elaborate way of saying: no, the current reactions are pretty firmly warranted.

Sometimes I think Korea designed its cuisine specifically to irritate rabbis.

Jughead's book is this show's Invitation to Love. And I mean that in an extremely good way.

Alex Reiger from Taxi.

Ronin airs all the time on one basic-cable channel or another, and whenever it does, I rewatch it and enjoy myself just as much every damned time. One of its more distinctive claims to fame as a film: Sean Bean's character doesn't die (except socially).