“Hey, collusions are part of the game. That’s why we wear helmets.”
- Emmitt Smith

Leslie, Serena is not dating Drake anymore. He’s just a front runner and realized that he needs to stay close by. She’s been dating her coach Patrick for a hot minute now

Here is a picture of him personally removing all videos from YouTube:

This is shaping up to be a perfect storm for some sort of Woj-Simmons-Olbermann partnership.

I wouldn’t let that stock photo girl leave either. She’s HOT HOT HOT!

How about the kid he kneed in the face?

That’s lame- why did the video cut out before Zack Hample came in and punched the kid in the face and took his stuff?

I think Giancarlo may actually be a Time Lord hitting baseballs through time and space.

Oh wow didn’t know we had multiple versions running down 75. My mistake.

Abby Wambach is complaining? Must be a day that ends in “day”.

Hope Andrade doesn’t score an accidental own goal, we’ll see how fearless she is then

Lebron’s 4-2 record tops Jordan’s 0-6 record. GOAT

You may have achieved the remarkable distinction of becoming more of an asshole with each paragraph.

“Hey, you’re black, right?”

“When we were in residency in Florida, Brandi would say, ‘Tony, can we get a couple of vans and go over to watch the [MLS’s] Tampa Bay Mutiny?’ We would get the vans, but it was her idea. She just wanted to watch top-level soccer.”

Can you blame him? Imagine sitting next to someone who is constantly cheering for Matthew Della-Della-Della-Dellavedova.

Thanks but no thanks, Lubbock. I’m much better off getting my medical advice from Doc Emrick.

BENJAMIN FRANKLIN IS KILLIN’ THE GAME!