So many more questions.... was he looking for gay service members or did he claim to be a girl? If you’re a straight guy, why do you even look at that profile?

Iceland are just like Boris Johnson, fuck up England and then leave.

“Imagine if this one sport adopted rules from a completely different sport to decide the outcome.”

So Haq a Shaq, that's the hallmark of a real sport?

Counterpoint: PKs is fine.

This is all you need to know about Ed Werder. That he misspelled “even” is just icing on the cake.

Cleveland used to find bizarre ways to lose things... But, lately, Cleveland has found bizarre ways to win things, like hitting a home run off a team’s starting 2nd baseman in the 19th inning. I was starting to think the game was just going to keep going until everyone from the Jays had been ejected.

The Indians haven’t lost since the Cavs won the Championship.

“Is a hippopotamus really a hippopotamus or just a really cool opotamus?” - Mitch Hedberg

You’re ignoring the fact that LeBron was drafted 13 years ago and left Cleveland at one point, the Kyrie led Cavs sucked, and the other #1 overall pick they made is already out of the league. This championship Cavs team was assembled through free agency, not the draft.

Coincidentally, A-Rod became a jerk-off in a cup.

Give Girardi a break; Vince Vaughn has been doing it for more than a decade.

“Every book is a children’s book if the kid can read.” - Mitch Hedberg

“Are you really going to do this the whole year???”

England sees your slow clap and raises you slow, ponderous attack devoid of ideas.

Did they shut the entire country down so everyone could go to these games? There’s, like, a fifth of the country in the stands.

They do it every ten minutes or so during the game, too. It’s terrifying, and absolutely fantastic.

i miss when this guy was on top of the world.

The awesomeness is strong in this one.