“In an altered paranoid state, believing ordinary citizens were government officials that were tracking him and recording him.”

I could see how this would be difficult for someone so used to going...
*Puts on shades*
unnoticed.

Better not have been at Planet Fitness. They frown on dumbbell throwing, especially if you grunt while doing it.

Godspeed, Ed. Here’s hoping you and Mrs. Ed are having a swell time.

My best, Ed

Meh: after the last Christian hack the Jets put under center, it’s hard to blame them for being hesitant with this one.

Kudos to whoever edited out the other 8000 plus words.

When a European soccer star moves to the United States for the twilight of his career, it’s only a matter of time before he’s involved in one of two hilarious incidents: He oversells an injury or gets a red card for a stupid reason.

You can see, even in transition, the moment the ball hits Harden’s hands and he does the little hand wave, everything grinds to a fucking unbearable halt. It’s the basketball equivalent of a dude busting in on a conversation with, “Well, actually...”
Even if it’s right, I fucking hate it and want to set it on fire.

Goddamn kids. Not that kind of rally!

Later that night they planned to burn a large wooden T on someone’s lawn. To let them know it was the Tennis team.

This is incredibly short-sighted on Honnold’s part. He isn’t considering all the possible records he is leaving on the table - first freeclimb of the Sector D7 Yosemite Oil Rig; speed climbing the crane used for mountaintop removal in the Smokies, freesoloing the wellbore casing used for fracking Zion National...The…

All I see is a carry in the first clip and an offensive foul (push off) in the 2nd. But I mean why not since 3-4 steps with no travel call happens about 50 times a game these days.

I often see white parents with obviously adopted black children, I’d call the police but they’d probably arrest the kids.

First you say he’s too good for the minor leagues, then you say he should be playing for the Blue Jays. Which is it?

Unfortunately that just isn’t the case. I have worked at both Target and Home Depot. Home Depot was much worse. I have also worked at McDonald’s, Wendy’s, Applebees, GAP, Bed Bath & Beyond, Best Buy, and Circuit City back when that was around. I worked at Lowe’s one summer too. Home Depot wasn’t just worse than all of…

You can go pro in baseball, hockey, tennis or golf without going to any college - but not in football or basketball.

Sheldon Adelson is Jewish, so Hell isn’t in his theological future.

Which step in The Process is having two 1st pick overall point guards with horribly broken jump shots? I seem to have lost my flowchart.

fuck off! You obviously haven’t had my grandma’s ChicKenmore Parmolive

Ironically, it was his healthy foot that kept the USMNT out of the WC.