Valid question. I’m simply FASCINATED that people still watch this show. And I’m consistently entertained by the fact that the writers are still coming up with reasons to keep Rick alive, when he’s the dumbest protagonist on TV. It’s shaudenfreude, and it’s such a huge show, so I’m upset that it’s so boring and yet so…

-You need a new show to watch

This recap barely had anything from the episode actually in it; not to fault your writing or your critical abilities, it just sounds like I did a better service to Carl’s memory when I stopped watching three years ago. He’s just sitting on a rooftop, eating a gallon of chocolate pudding and being way cooler than his…

As a Missourian, my grin has gone from smug satisfaction all the way to Jack Napier sized over the past 30 minutes.

This is not how you use parentheses, yo.

Straight up: I don’t want to watch another second of slow, boring ass men’s hockey after that match last night. The women look way, way more capable at playing their sport, based solely off of how fast they have to skate to keep the game moving. It’s insane how boring I find men’s hockey, and how gripped I was by that…

No. Blame the j-school teachers; it’s the older generation of people (whose ages are similar to those of the average Fox News viewer) who taught their students how to write stories, and what would be considered an important story. It’s not entirely the fault of those journalists that they listened to bad advice, but…

Literally every j-school graduate for the past 20 years has been taught to avoid sensitive topics, thanks to the boomers and their inability to talk about their problems.

Yo, we literally do not have to talk about this dork anymore

Syndicate’s my favorite; long live Evie Frye!

I fell right off the boat with Black Flag, after I got to the point where I had to beef up my ship to advance the story. If the story weren’t gated like that, I would’ve loved it, but forcing the sailing on players who just came to use their hidden blades in pirate times felt oppressive.

That’s rad!

I will go down to 15% if the service was really off, but I don’t want to be mean. Even if the service is the worst in the world, I’d never go under 10%, and these are only in extreme cases. My minimum tip is always 20%.

I hereby order you to pay no less than 20% at any restaurant, for the rest of your life. Because it sounds like you’ve been short changing a lot of folks over the years, and you need to realize you’re talking about people’s income here. 20% from now on, ok?

Oh, my goodness...that’s what you think is going on? It’s way simpler than that; it’s about money.

I mean, this is mostly true, from what I’ve seen. I’m ok with guns for sport, and watching the biathlon lately; that shit is COOL. But it’s a sport, and it has a clear purpose, and those people are better marksmen than the average American, so it’s not about ownership for me, although I don’t own guns myself.

Sorry, but we have to start lumping all gun owners together now. We did it with people who wear shoes onto airplanes, and this should be no different.

Cool, well, you sound confident enough to get by without those things. Give up the guns, and you can keep the cars.

Welp, I guess I’m going to Chicago...this list isn’t all that inclusive...

Nope. I did not say that.