HAHA. So simple, so timeless.

By the way, what are the odds that I click submit and somehow lose this plea that I tediously typed on a goddamn cell phone? Very high, no doubt.

Someone lost their weed tolerance while in the Big House.

Very high, no doubt.

What just happened

Katie Nolan is not impressed.

Ronald Roberts sounds like the name of a character that Dave Chappelle would do in white face.

Thank you for your brilliant analysis and wonderful contribution to the discussion.

I know humor is valued and appreciated here, but stories where autistic children are terrorized make me insanely angry. I try not to wish harm upon others, but I hope those two cruel teens get what's coming to them.

He would probably be one of the 5 best players on the Raiders.

The more details surface regarding Bironas's death, the weirder this story gets.

Stikc ot sprots

I know that Brady's career could end tomorrow and he would likely be considered a top 5 quarterback of all time, but has any QB at his level ever had more of his career wasted by a front office/coach that has basically refused to give him any real help? If he had a WR group like the Broncos, any NFC North team not…

I'd definitely be interested in reading peer-reviewed research on how in-patient drug rehab involving fucking horses is "hugely successful" for people who have succumbed to the temptations and sorrows of marihuana.

Ray Rice gets two weeks (initially).

Tries to extort a 20yr old college student for $7million .... and I'm unprofessional.

Per @JayGlazer, refs say Colin Kaepernick dropped the N-word on the field last week. Kaepernick denying it, saying he found it there.

Looks like weed to me.

Gonna be a lot of people in Baltimore with Joe Flacco jerseys tomorrow.