Mesmerizing.

According to one of my Grandpa’s favorite jokes, it’s D (this is the closest version I could find with the googles):

Yes! I think someone linked me to her Van Helsing In Fifteen Minutes like ten or twelve years ago and I've been hooked since.

You should check out her movie recaps too, she is hilarious!

But you definitely SHOULD read Cleolinda’s live-tweet recaps (she did recaps of the films and they are horrifyingly funny even for someone like me who has not read the books or seen the films).

But will there be white people almost kissing?

Pretty sure it’s whatever man-bot churns out those Answers.com articles that always sound like they were written by an alien who *pretty much* gets English and humanity.

Yeah, I bought a few pairs of Merona tights in bright colors and they lasted me two or three winters, and the fit was good (could pull up over the belly). I’d love to try We Love Colors or whatever but if they can’t guarantee they’ll last for years, I’m going to just keep buying these for ~$6.

Yeah, I bought a few pairs of Merona tights in bright colors and they lasted me two or three winters, and the fit…

Literally snorting.

Oh god, we have those (or something very similar, people also call the banana spiders) here. I seriously reconsidered moving here for a job purely because of them.

Oh god you win nothing could be worse.

Same, which is maybe why I can't fathom being chipper about a pet situation like this.

So does my cat and I still love that asshole - but if I had to spend $37K on house modifications and he'd destroyed this much stuff (and I'd have to imagine it's a matter of constant vigilance as well as huge expense) I don't know if I'd feel the same. But then I'm not of the belief that pets are the same as children.

I guess this is how I feel - I have a kid and a pet (and have owned and loved many pets) but this is so far beyond what I could tolerate. Like with super expensive weddings, it's incomprehensible to me but if it works for their life and budget, whatever.

Totally prepared for a Team Dog flaming when I ask, if he is an unstoppable eats-everything super-expensive juggernaut, why can they not imagine life without this dog? What is there about him to love to pieces? I’m not saying they should abandon him or have him put down or anything cruel or drastic, but like...what…

UGH.

Little girls absolutely could and do wear the “boys’” costumes. But like, we live in a world where that logic puzzle about the man and his kid in a car accident and the doctor won’t operate on the kid “because this is my son” can exist, because we’re all conditioned to think doctor=man and this is where it starts.

THANK you. I was scrolling and scrolling like “WHY HAS NO ONE MADE A NAZI SOUP/SOUP NAZI JOKE YET”.

LOL that happens to me all the time. Especially posts like this where there’s too many comments to read them all.

I never heard of this practice until I moved to the Deep South. I actually prefer being called Miss Stranger to Mrs Bird. I agree with a lot of what beets said in the original comment, but from working with lots of kids as a librarian, honorifics can serve as a shorthand for “Guys, this is a person you need to pay…