Argh! I thought the same thing! "Oh no, thin person, we didn't mean YOU. YOU are not one of the fat-and-therefore-OBVIOUSLY-unhealthy people we targeted this at!"

This line sat a little wrongly with me for exactly that reason.

I learned this from dooce.com.

Me too!

I dyed my hair black at the same age with similar results. I'm so pale, it was a terrible decision.

Never ignore George Washington.

I did two layers of neon socks back in those days because you can never have enough neon knitwear. So jealous of your sweet-ass bike!

Yeah, NPH did feel kind of shoehorned in. Like, do we really need another character with major lines and scenes at this point?

I've subbed in tarragon for the basil, too. It's espevially good for using the pesto as a topping/crust gor grilled or baked chicken.

It's in the same range as "I was spanked as a kid, and I turned out fine!"

True.

I got stitches after slicing my thumb open with a plastic butter knife once. Fuckers are sharp.

This is also my theory for Midsomer Murders. It's totally Mrs. Barnaby! Why else would so many people die in these tiny villages, and she's always right there taking an art class or singing in the church choir when it happens. Barnaby is desperately trying to cover up for his wife.

Yeah, I got my zits airbrushed on my senior photo but it also took away my freckles and the resulting photos were deeply weird to me.

When we got our senior photos we had the OPTION of having zits and shit airbrushed out. I can't even believe that these students were TOLD photoshopping zits would happen, let alone all the other stuff. Plus, these photos were for IDs, right? So isn't the point of the ID photo not to look good, but for the picture…

Jia Tolentino I kind of love you, plz write more.

Glad I'm not the only one whose mind went there.

After a while I just kept clicking the links out of determination to see this through to the end (still sad there is no resolution in the form of ungreying for you).

Short but to the point! Why does this not have more likes?!

I read an article in the Smithsonian magazine a year or two ago that really drive this home for me. The author was figuring out how/if he was related to Charlemagne as part of a genealogy project and the conclusion was that basically, when you're going back that far (9th century), everyone's descended from him,…