Idk, the “Chubby Chaser” sticker on my redneck cousin’s truck really shares his views on body positivity accurately.

That reminds me of the bigger problem of the “internet of things.” I’d rather just make a grocery list than have an internet-enabled fridge with cameras inside for remotely checking the contents. Not everything that can be connected should be. We’re adding lots of vulnerabilities we don’t need.

Sell it with the oil-slick and smokescreen devices. Call it the “Spy Hunter” package.

IDEA: buy one for yourself attach it whenever you park illegally and remove when you leave.

Saying a master locksmith can pick anything doesn’t mean you should leave your business unlocked. The point is they’re barely bothering with security at all right now. Obviously nothing is foolproof, but there needs to be a decent-sized bar that’s hard for most to hurdle.

“Hey Car, go to Colorado and make it fast.”

Killing is killing is killing.

What?!?! You mean there may be some gray areas and subtle complexities in the world. My tv tells me to only think in absolutes.

Maybe I was wrong to express cynicism about major leaguers throwing their weight behind amateur opposition to the draft.

If that were a stock, it would be Worldcom.

But towards the eastern or western front?

OOH a Passat! It’s like a car, only less reliable.

If it was so rare why did they fuck it up

The Browns have yet to purchase any as the team prefers to just shit on the field.

C’mon, it was invented by mechanical engineering students at Alabama. We’re not talking Cal Tech here. I’m pretty sure “how to use your erector set” is a graduate level course. Nice of these teams to throw them a bone. I think NFL teams are using this kind of like how your dad used to use that ash tray you made on…

“It says a lot about who runs the NFL that a god damn nylon cover attached to pvc pipe is some type of “new and advanced” player friendly sideline addition.”

I am not sure what made me laugh harder, that a group of mechanical engineering students got college credit for designing a freakin’ tent, or that the same University that gave them said credit then paid them money to use it.

It says a lot about who runs the NFL that a god damn nylon cover attached to pvc pipe is some type of “new and advanced” player friendly sideline addition.

Faking your own kidnapping is an idea that requires plenty of cocaine to fuel the journey from inspiration to execution.

Is there a celebrity with a higher success to talent ratio than Kathy Griffin? She’s the Kiss of comedians.