Had almost the exact same situation,minus two birds, and exchanging the air rifle for a paintball gun and pigeons for a robin redbreast.

A number of years ago, I was living with my mom in her townhouse. One summer, we had a pretty serious mouse infestation. It was bad, I'm talking 3-4 encounters with the little bastards per night. Luckily, my cat was in her athletic cat-prime at the time. Not only that, but she was/still kind of is extra badass. We…

Ha, fuck you I can't! Now, watch this shi-*has a stroke*

*facepalming while smdhing*

This is dumbfunny.

Marv Albert: Here's Sism, with another First Amendment joke-yes!

Xabi Alonso is the most beautiful man.

This is a great rant. Not sure why it's directed at me though, unless you're contesting that Howard won't be a part of the squad in 2018, which is what I said.

Number one, yesyesyesyesyes

Germany-Didn't have any depth at striker this past WC. I'd say it worked out pretty well for them.

Also, yes, I don't watch the MLS much. I don't have a local team, and if I'm going to follow the game via televised broadcasts, why deliberately not watch the best leagues in the world? But, of course, this has nothing to with the fact that I never, at any point in this thread, knocked the MLS or the growth of the…

Wait, what? What's a psedo fan? And what does the MLS have to do with this? I never said the league wouldn't improve (marginally) over the 4 years. It will improve (marginally). Still won't be able to rival the quality of players produced by the youth systems of Germany, Argentina, Brazil, Spain, France, Italy, and…

Then, please, enlighten me with all of your soccer knowledge as to why the semifinals of the WC are a realistic goal for a team with medium range talent.

This is brilliant.

Because he'll be 39, and they have other talented keepers. 39, even for a keeper, is old as shit.

Yeah, but that doesn't suit my joke as well.

Thank you. I was waiting for this.

You're really good at this.

Imagine if his list of curse words included racial slurs. Bruins fans would literally be off the chart.

Fuck this asshole, I hope he fucks a monkey's cunt and catches fucking AIDS.