This guy was around for nearly 20 years and this is the first yo-yo joke I ever heard in reference to him.

I lol’d. Because, you know, San Antonio is so cosmopolitan.

“There’s a cultural desert there.”

The Magic came hard.

I look forward to continuing my time-honored tradition of not watching this show.

This article got a lot more depressing the longer I read it.

Skip Bayless, short-circuiting: The Durant signing has thrown him for a loop! He’s questioning his identity! He’s acting out! That team is going to implode!

Lt. Scott Wrigglesworth: FOR THE LAST TIME, STOP ASKING QUESTIONS ABOUT THE NAME!!! I’M SICK TO FUCKING DEATH OF ANSWERING THIS- oh, you mean the NBA player’s name?

Actually, I am surprised someone had the balls to report him.

“about damn time” -Steven Adams' testicles

Drew Magary - [sees shorts]

“It must really suck to be friends with Gilbert Arenas.”

I hope when that kid grows up, he finds Gilbert Arenas and beats the shit out of him.

Real mature man... Make jokes about a serious situation when Carmelo can't even defend himself...

First off let me start off by saying “ All Praise Due To The Most High.”

When Carmelo thinks theres been too many shots taken, its about time we make some changes.

“ Take Charge. Take Action.”

“Now, Russ. I’m not just your football coach. I’m your life coach! I want you to stay positive and upbeat. I want you to go in there and melt her panties right off of her. I want you to be the carefully controlled and highly orchestrated explosions to her steel beams.”