Own it, sister. You’re popular and you probably have shinier hair than the rest of us too. *pounds fist on table

I love the “I passed on so many offers”

It took a lot of little clues here and there for me to realize I look older than my age as well. I was feeling pretty good about myself until people kept dropping hints here and there. I finally “got it” when I told a stranger my son’s age and she replied with some comment about having children later in life. I did…

I am not aging well at all and it does kind of hurt to not recognize yourself anymore. Carrie Fisher’s attitude and intelligence about the process has helped me so much. Whenever I see the tired, old lady looking back at me in the mirror, I’ll remind myself of this quote and get the fuck over it.

I love all of Christmas episodes of The King of Queens. They’ve been playing them on TV—I’m in heaven!

Your kid will probably be fine if you take a few hits here & there, but not worth the risk — the risk of having CPS get involved, that is. Some places will test your baby’s meconium to check for drugs. If you smoke weed within five months of giving birth, thc might be in the baby pooh. Just don’t do it, ladies. It was…

Why is it so hard to believe? Hundreds of people kept Bill Cosby’s raping a secret for decades. Famous people stick together, it’s crazy.

OK, I didn’t see that story ending the way it did, ha. Thought it was going to be a tearjerker. Nope.

Do you even lift, bro? Go cry and jerk off into your sock for the night.

Fair enough.

Uhm, no bias here. What is this shit allover Rich business lately? I like his posts and he seems cool. Everyone chill.

Every now and then I experience relief about having had a boy for this reason alone, then I remember Jerry Sandusky and Michael Jackson and all of the other pedos who prefer boys to girls.

Yep. And before I had children, I could read horrific stories like this and be upset about it all day. Now when I read stories like this, it stays with me.

I need to vent after reading all of that. Let me get this straight: your husband is bored and miserable with his life (probably has his own anxiety about turning into an ugly, old ass man) so he bangs a 20-year-old (who is too dumb to know any better) just to feel good about himself for five minutes, then he blames…

I’m another atheist who celebrates Christmas. When I was a kid, my mom was a Jehovah’s Witness and my father a Muslim immigrant from Iran— and we always celebrated Christmas. Break the rules, man! Fight the power! Christmas is the only thing that gets me through this dreadful time of year :P

Just scratch the drama and give us another show like Roseanne.

It was supposed to be James, a porn director (who I’d been in touch with via text & email to set it up), me and my friend. The porn director was a no show, but there were some other suprise guests... The fucker double booked another fan and invited two random porn people to join us (an extremely shy pornstar named…

One highlight was him getting pissed off at me because I questioned Dr. Drew’s ethics. He was bragging about being an acquaintance of Dr. Drew’s during the dinner. “Yeah, after this, I was thinking we could head over to Dr. Drew’s radio show,” he said.

Oh, no doubt he’ll move behind the camera and start directing women to eat each other’s shit or whatever else he’s into, but I still wish dick issues upon the man! It’s pretty obvious he enjoys sticking his penis in things and I want to take that joy from him :D

It should have been offered to me on a silver platter, I felt. Nope, just two small glasses of (probably boxed) wine.