God I loved Patty, and while for the most part I’ve been willing to go along with the terrible stories the Flash has done since then, Barry and Iris has never sat even remotely well with me because every time I see them I think “that should be patty goddamnit”

Some of these burns are way too good to have ever been written by trump. There’s not a chance in hell he’d ever come up with something as witty as “I’M CALLING A STATE OF EMERGENCY FOR OMAROSA’S CAREER”

Yes. gallows humor is the humor from the point of view of the man in the gallows, not the men watching the man in the gallows, or even the man who put the man in the gallows. That’s just being an asshole

wait... what was controversial about the lady gaga performance? I at least remember what it was about Beyonce’s performance that pissed off idiots, but I’m completely blanking on what Lady Gaga did that would irk the dumbass demographic.

You’re telling me we could have been free from Sean Hannity 17 years ago, and all it would have cost was one democratic politician’s career?

The youngest millennials are well out of college now. We need someone to tell us what fall fashions to wear to therapy.

I still contend that his global warming tweet from the end of 2017 is the dumbest tweet in history

Donald trump thinks this guy needs to calm down.

I bought NBA 2k16 and played the awful Spike Lee my character mode for about 45 minutes before I got up and tried to return the game. Best Buy wouldn’t let me because it was opened, so I sold it to GameStop for half of what I had payed for it 2 hours earlier. I’ve given up on games faster than that before, but none…

Everyone knows that the real corrupt politicians are the anti-corruption politicians.

He’s gonna kill himself to undercut McCain’s funeral.

I’ve discussed this with my roommate before. Moms in general LOVE it. I don’t know what it is, but something must switch in your brain when you give birth that draws you in to it. You could hate this show for its entire run up until you give birth, but then suddenly its top-tier comedy. I’ve never met a mom who didn’t…

Bojack and American Vandal on the 14th? Guess I’m calling in sick that day

Goddamn just hook this shit straight into my veins

To celebrate the end of our senior year (and college careers), my friends and I had a “game night” party the night after finals were done, where we got drunk and played various game show games. When we got to the “Lip Sync Battle” part of the night, I went hard on “Let it Go” from Frozen, and ended up twisting my…

I went to school in central New York, so I went up to Syracuse several times for college basketball games. They do the “O” yell during the anthem too.

especially now that you don’t even have to throw a single pitch to walk someone! a couple years ago, sure, hitting a guy was the most efficient way to get him out of the way and on first, but now you just tell the umpire the batter can have first and move on to the next guy

I’m always happy to spread the gospel of Milkshake Duck

There has only ever been one good tweet in the history of twitter and that is milkshake duck. Everything else has been varying degrees of bad.

I had the exact same “Oh... they’re singing about Jesus...” moment too when I was young and listening to skillet.