Imagine the rectal pain to poop out our current president. Why do you hate sharks so much?

Just don’t scratch, just makes it worse.

He was a regular at the Indy 500 for the month of May preceding the race. Ran into him a couple more times after he almost killed me, nothing but non-creepy charming (I was a college intern at the time).  He was known for not being a predatory douche.

Nice Celebrity II: James Garner once apologized for almost flattening me with a golf cart. P.S. I’m old. P.P.S. Google young James Garner, he was a total hunk. P.P.P.S. Only olds say “hunk.”

Hopefully not down there. That’s never good.

We can use it as an escape boat on the sea of barf too!

Good to know. It’s going to get damaged (with a lot of barf).

We’re going to need a bigger bag.

Lark.

Just want to say you really want to avoid the slow clap. It’s known to be antibiotic resistant.

I constantly have to shut down requests to open an artisinal bakery down there.

This kid’s nickname is probably Potato or something.

New arrivals probably want to make sure they are fluent in DUMBASS so they can understand all the shit coming from President Dumbass and his band of buttheads in the White House.

Kim. Some people want to be her, some people want to be with her. I just want to be her lawyer. I could get a boat.

At risk of prosecution, PETA people go into factory farms and uncover horrific animal abuse (video available on line). They also advocate for animals needlessly tortured in laboratories (also available on line -check out the beagles and baby monkeys being experimented on). These animals are generally not the cute…

I know, right? You should see some of the nasty comments i have had to dismiss whenever I mention animal welfare. Not just “ha ha here’s the list of meats I ate today,” those are always so original, but just meanness. It always surprises me that an activist on-line community filled with people who post photos and…

I’m glad all the commenters on Jez are keeping their cool factor up there and hating PETA. The “I hate PETA” and “Fuck PETA” circle jerk comments crack me up. Go eat a ham sandwich and pat yourselves on the back a little more, why don’t you?

3:30 EST weekdays? I’ll do it.

Tuesdays and Thursdays 3:30p. I vote yes. Mondays and Fridays too easy, Wednesday too obvious. Power to the people.

Do you mean the universal language of the doomed? We will shortly all be fluent.