Oh my gawd I can mix drinks and request to be invited.

Also, I nominate her for moderating the presidential debates. She will NOT tolerate any of Trump’s fuckery.

Can I come to this party??

I unabashedly, unapologetically, unironically love Judge Judy. LOVE her. I love how she refuses to suffer fools, I love how she shuts people down with just a look, I love how she yells when she’s just fucking DONE with someone, I love how she says things like DON’T PISS ON MY LEG AND TELL ME IT’S RAINING.

Her favorite technology? A flyswatter.

I just think your post reflects a passion and a clarity and a directness that could work on television.

After 20 years, 95 percent of the cases she hears can be summed up in one sentence: DON’T LEND PEOPLE MONEY.