Laughed out loud at my desk. Goddammit all.
TwoFishFlavors
jayfiedlersbrokenthumb
“ Put on a show while I go fill your mom with dick nectar”
Welcome back to Behind Closed Ovens, where we take a look at the best and strangest stories from inside the food…
The people at Gawker did a hell of a thing when they hired Greg Howard to write for them, and I am sure I’m not the only one who is thankful they did.
It’s easy to think that the field of parking lot-inspired dickshittery is stagnating. What real innovations have you…
ESPN’s Baxter Holmes has a long, thoroughly entertaining piece about the lifecycle of an NBA basketball, pegged to…
I wrote for the Wolves from 2011-2013. Kirilenko was awesome. First of all, his crazy kids were always running around, trolling everyone in sight. They would pester Pek especially. Then, one day, I asked if they spoke the same language as Pek, and Kirilenko got pissed. “NO. He speaks Serbian. We speak Russian. VERY…
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As it turns out, the way you stop Allen Iverson is with cheap domestic beer and a good divorce lawyer. Journalist…
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Fallout is back, and, as expected, it’s headed to post-apocalyptic Boston. You can watch the first (great) trailer…
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Here’s an ad featuring Marlins first baseman Michael Morse promoting the “Fish ‘N Chips Casino Party,” where “me and…
This Dodge Challenger Hellcat was spared from a tornado that completely destroyed everything around it. That or we…
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I had an ‘89 Riviera, the last year with that dash and CRT-based touchscreen. By the time I got the car in 2005, it had been beaten down, picked up, and beaten down again. It had 194,000 miles, body damage, and all the marks and stains of a hard life. But by some miracle, that screen had survived 16 years of…
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Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here.
"I never title it in my name because well why would I? It adds an extra completely unnecessary step, then I have to pay sales tax and wait 2-4 weeks for a new title just so it has my name on it."
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This was, without a doubt, my favorite moment from last night’s game between the Cavaliers and Celtics. A little…
I had an appointment at my local dealership a few years ago, to look at the then-new sedan model. I was pretty optimistic. I caught the sales manager snorting cocaine in the coffee room and during the test drive some hoods firebombed our car, causing us to flip. The salesman tried to fend them off with a shotgun,…
Due to a number of reasons, I decided that it was time to move on to another car. My DD, a 2011 WRX was getting to be a bit too small for the family, plus my wife refuses to learn to drive stick. Also, I just didn't like driving the car all that much. I decided to go the 'New' route because 2014's were getting good…
My 15-year-old niece got a talking-to from her high school guidance counselor for the exact same thing. She’s “too confident in her answers,” and it upsets her male teachers. Because…they’re overly emotional, insecure crybabies, I guess?
If you are a working woman who has read anything about the Ellen Pao discrimination case, your reaction has likely…
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If nothing else, The Gunman gives us a scene in which Sean Penn goes surfing. Of all the mysteries of centuries of…