“I do like cars, but I like funky cars, like 1980s cars, trucks and vans.”

Ford Flex. The perfect refrigerator on wheels.

1. Try using the words “sexy” and “Kia” in the same sentence. Does any part of your face twitch involuntarily as you say it?

And me thought me had problems with grammar!

Trump prefers to get that organically, I hear.

Yet, historically, it can always be beaten by the Eli Manning Edition.

Pretty sure that 70% of cars people leave “the factory” with defective blinkers thinkers.

Check out a Taurus, too. I went from a first-generation Mazda 6 to a 2008 Taurus and as my wife put it, it felt like we finally got a grown-up’s car.

How about a Ford Flex? Unique styling = yes. 2,000lbs tow rating. LOTS of room. Not the greatest MPG at 23 HWY. Plus you can get the with factory rook racks for camping/activity gear.

“Low-Ass Bridge Gives Red Light Runner A Taste Of Instant Karma”

It was picked up not because of anything he was wearing, but a bit more to do with how he climbed on a moving schoolbus and went batshit.

Dames Bond.

My brother used to live in a condo complex in downtown Cincinnati. They had quite a bit of free street parking available and they required a sticker or other tag to be visible to park on the private streets. But they only enforced that rule M-F 8am-5pm. After working hours and on the weekends they didn’t care who…

Bud Light is like making love in a Canoe...

It wasn’t a rental, per se, but one time these kids dropped off a 1961 Ferrari 250 GT California at the parking garage I worked at. I knew they were probably playing hooky from high school and it was most likely their parent’s car, so me and a buddy took it for a joy ride around the streets of Chicago. There may have…

I don’t like to resort to name-calling, but this women is a worthless little twat. That expression on her face reads, “Yeah I did it, what of it? My daddy will post bail in ten minutes and I’ll be back at my Enterprise receptionist job by tomorrow morning lol.”

I only like these because they bear a passing resemblance to the Oldsmobile Aurora, which I have the weirdest car crush on.

Late lunch is the only answer. If you leave for lunch at 1 or 2, then you have less of the day to come back to. HOW DOES EVERYONE NOT KNOW THIS?

A more sophisticated suspension provides even more chewy alternatives. Like this suspension member off an old Saturn.