I used to feel envious of men when I got invited to a black-tie affair. I’d be going from store to store driving myself crazy trying on appropriate dresses, all the while thinking “Lucky men! They just put on a tuxedo and automatically look good.” Welp, I can’t say that any longer. Trump is the one man on earth who…

Don’t get you someone who looks at you like Melania looks at Donnie. Their relationship is a nightmare.

Hey everyone! It’s the couple no one wants at any party ever!

He looks like a malevolent Christmas tree ornament. Like if the Monopoly bigwig was made into an ornament for Satan’s tree.

You guys missed a good one, just bundle up

I wonder how the drunk guy would have fared at The Brownstone, the place in Paterson owned by the Manzos of Real Housewives of New Jersey “fame.” Probably not well.

Which is odd, because TRump has a reputation for using his kids to reinforce his own image. If you’re trying to portray yourself as the King of American Values, taking the kid along to church with you would be a given. (Heck, we’re considered the family liberals, and the holiday church-going-as-a-family is still…

I’m a therapist and one of my clients is in her early twenties and hilarious, and she left her last session with “merry Christmas, happy holidays, kumbaya or whatever the fuck you celebrate!”

I told the checkout girl at CVS “happy whatever” and she seemed to thoroughly enjoy that.

*tears of grief* Gods I miss them so much! */tears of grief*

Creamy kale, the Trump way, is a cup of cream sauce over a single leaf of kale, minus the stem.

Donald Trump ate a vegetable? I don’t believe it. Fake news

Yeah, the most scary trainwreck experiences I’ve had with drugs involved edibles ... and I managed to get through an entire sheet of LSD in one semester.

Because it’s very common and we live in uncertain times. It makes me happy that people can ask for and get help.

Yep. Started Lexapro this year and BOY HOWDY are my days better. I always figured I didn’t need anything because I was capable of getting out of bed, going to work, public speaking, etc. But now I can do those things without my heart constantly racing and my brain constantly worrying things into the ground.

Indeed. I started on 20 mg citalopram (generic name for Celexa) approximately one year ago, and it is the best decision I’ve ever made for myself. Thank you science, for giving me myself again.

No, it doesn’t make me sad, it makes me constantly elated and in love with modern science that has produced such a miracle! No more throwing myself against a random building as i walk home because suddenly the sadness of the universe is too much to bear and I’m sobbing....I still get sad and mad and all the other…

Huh. I actually looked him up on Wikipedia because I wasn’t sure if you were joking or not. I’d never heard this before!

No, it’s def Mario.

“Jones is a puppet.” “Moore will always vote with us.” Cognitive dissonance at its absolute apex.