I mean it’s going to be sad and then hilarious when he tries to ride that Horse into the Long building next January and is dragged out by Capitol Police.

I’ll tell Paul Ryan the same thing I tell my parents and all their noisy friends: you want me to have babies, create an environment where having and raising a child doesn’t cost an entire adult person’s salary and I’ll think about it.

Yeah? I should have kids? I’m in my mid 30s, unmarried, don’t own a home, and I’m still paying off extensive student loans. You fuckers have made it impossible for this generation to afford anything, and yet you think we should procreate so we can, what, have a new generation of struggling poors?

So like ... can I have maternity leave? Affordable prenatal care? Any treatment for my battered lady-bits after birth? Help with childcare? (My parents live very, very far away and I really like what I do for a living.) Will my daughters be able to get jobs where they won’t be harassed by their employers, or is their…

Here’s the deal:

Situation A:
Close race, but the loser knows she/he lost: Concede. Look like an honorable loser. Move on with your life. Let the nation/state move on with the victor.

Situation B:
Close race, the loser refuses to admit she/he lost: Demand recounts and wait for the official tally. Cost the taxpayers money…

Really nice work here Drew. You might even say this joke was... called well.

Both :D

Today we no longer recognize the universal truth: that God is the author of our life and liberty.

A splinter in your eye, perhaps? You came to the right place ;-)

I have friends who sing the praises of Dr. Bronner Castile Soap; whenevr they do so I always say “Have you read the bottle??!! There’s some crazy ass crap going on in that company!”

I’ve never seen nor heard the word “poltroon” before but it somehow describes Pai perfectly to me.

*APPLAUSE*

Naw, I can’t watch this. It’ll just make me want to hop the first flight to DC and cave his smug fucking skull in with a tire iron.

That district isn’t going to elect a democrat. Half the people there will probably blame the Dems for driving this “man of God” to his death.

Same. The person who sexually assaulted me when I was in middle school committed suicide my senior year of high school. I had wished he was dead at points and even though it really wasn’t logical, I blamed myself for his suicide because of that. I also didn’t feel sad when I heard he died which also made me feel like…

It’s always interesting to watch conservatives attempt humor. The references are almost always hilariously out of date, the attempts at self-deprecation are usually painfully forced, and it comes across like they decided to improv the first take and then felt it was comedy gold that couldn’t be topped. It’s like…

I highly encourage everyone to read that exposé. It’s fucking crazy.

He took time out from being rapey to being a straight up racist with monkey pictures of the Obamas on his Facebook page.

I am deeply, deeply angry on behalf of his victim, if he did this as a final act of control. It’s possible she may never get vindication or justice now and I firmly believe that was a big part of his motive.

Not sad, not sorry.