FAKE NEWS

Someday, the only job robots haven’t taken from humans will be making The Sandwich.

A biggun.

Dude is going bald. Those aren’t bangs, that’s a combforward.

They forgot their tiki torches.

The best part is that Trump encouraged them to do this. Obstruction as an article of impeachment just wrote itself.

Hippie speedballs are great, but this coffee sucks so WHY

Yeah, this just became personal, you know. That raccoon, or as I like to call them loudly: “shit-ass motherfuckers”, will be returning to settle scores. The key is to anticipate this return (you are presumably the smarter one, right? If not, please put your cat on the phone), and prepare an ambush.

Right to say and do stupid shit without consequences. That’s like two right there.

WHY

I though Seattle had better-than-average teriyaki for a city it’s size? Have I been misinformed?

Nah, he’s in digital marketing so he knows how to create a burner for saying stupid, reactionary shit online.

Yeah, that’s the reason to start.

Then I can’t imagine the literal translation would have been much better. 

I mean: what does Iris Apfel over 80 years ago have to do with Korea? 

What does it have to do with Korea is my question.

I hope they end up giving her more time. 

It’s the smell of a cashed-out bowl that makes them unpopular. I have to be discreet due to my job, so I can’t have anything that stinks on me. Now, I still smoke joints because of this little baby below, but my preference is for the vape cartridges because you really can smoke them anywhere. (They do still smell like…

Obligatory In-n-Out counterpoint:

I mean she probably deserves this fame because she’s figured out the art of cooking in a cramped NYC kitchen, on a budget limited as much by space as her salary, using only ingredients that fit in her tiny-ass cupboards and fridge. Those constraints are what make her recipes almost universal. Me, I just make…