The last thing you want to do is waste 20 years with someone you love but who’s not your friend. Been there, have the t-shirt (and the divorce papers), and it’s the biggest mistake of my life.

#1—oh, that was my ex-husband. He always got mad, accused me of laughing AT him and no amount of reassurance saved me from the passive-aggressive crap he’d put me through for days after.

At 18 I believed in soulmates and One True Love. More than 20 years and a divorce later—AHAHAHAHAHA...oh, HELL NO!

I wish 18 year old me had understood that!

You’re being deliberately obtuse about this, but I’ll jump in too. Another reason why it’s a bad idea is that his “girlfriend” jumped from one relationship straight into a “relationship” with him and was talking about marriage and family withing months of it. HUGE red flag. HUGE!

With cheating there’s a lot more than one single poor judgement call. It’s a series of choices. It’s much different than forgetting to pay a bill.

It’s not about sexual fidelity. It’s about lies, manipulation, not addressing issues in the relationship, etc. If you want to have an open relationship, fine, but don’t promise fidelity and still think you can do whatever you want.

I’m sure they’ve all given bone marrow, a kidney, and part of their liver to save a dying child!

Some cultures do get rid of their aged when there is significant food stress. However, older adults do have value especially in preliterate societies.

Human children are born less developed and have a very long childhood. Parental investment is part of that; there’s a quality/quantity tradeoff that’s also happening.

It even seems like he’s arguing that rejection (not being laughed at—rejection!) is a given for a man, but not every women is murdered so we should be more concerned about men’s feelings. Of course, women are never rejected or laughed at by men either! Men seem so fragile, don’t they?

It was 21 years for me and my greatest regret is not leaving him. OK, well, my greatest regret is marrying him in the first place, lol.

Yes, because you’re certainly not a nice guy and you lack any understanding of anything outside your experience. You have no empathy and can’t even put yourself in another’s shoes on an article about a woman being murdered for rejecting a strange man.

The internet says that she has a networth of $300 million.

Thanks for posting that. I made a similar comment upthread. It’s not always like the PSAs make it seem.

Sometimes the warning signs are much more subtle than they’re portrayed in the PSAs. It’s not always overt. My Ex was a master of passive-aggressive abuse. My “favorite” was when he’d do the dishes loudly. Confrontation (as he called it), ie, asking what’s wrong, almost always led to escalation. He accuse me of…

Apparently throwing a cheap, plastic, bic pen in his general vicinity “provoked” him to tackle me to the ground, get on top of me, pin down my wrists and scream in my face. Later he said it was my fault for throwing a plastic pen (I “started it!”). However, he once literally tore a door apart in front of me. I’ve…

Yeah, until you’ve left your phone in one city, flown to another, and tried to find a working pay phone at the airport. It’s not like it was when you were a kid—pay phones are not ubiquitous, often don’t even work, and cost way more than a dime/quarter now.

No

and the fact that “holiday” literally means “holy days” just adds another level of WTFness to it. How dare we acknowledge that other people may have holy days that aren’t related to xianity.