If this is “fresh” I’m a zygote.

this is my friends dog. i am currently losing my goddamn mind over this.

My cousin went up in space with Mark Kelly to work on the Hubble. He’s about to find out if he’s going up to the ISS this spring! Eeeek!

I understand that as an argument for why pigmented makeup could be inappropriate. As in: she has a white parent, so it is inappropriate to make her up to look like she doesn’t. But are you suggesting that a black American actress cannot portray black characters on screen if one of her parents is white? That would…

Some Puerto Ricans and Dominicans are Black.

I totally pictured this:

Yes, it’s an awful tattoo... But am I the only one looking at that clip of JLO and thinking, “girl, Ben’s tattoo may be ugly but it’s still prettier than your last husband, the chupacabra”?

In Bertolucci’s the Dreamers the brother and sister have a menage a trois with a good-looking friend. Is this what you are insinuating, Lorde? You don’t have to say anything. Just scowl if I’m right.

Was hoping for ‘kabloom’

I was dying at the Internet freaking out about Leo’s win last night.

The only good thing about this Leo win is the ensuing model/pussy posse shitshow of debauchery that will be the next three months.

Mine seems into it or wants to be drawn like a French girl.

There really isn’t a perfect method for holding your other organs in position in the absence of a uterus.

My husband once complained to our RE after my egg retrieval that the room where he provided his sample didn’t have cell service, and the WiFi network blocked porn, so it was very difficult for him.

I’m a southerner. That was a perfectly executed “bless your heart,” 10/10 would bless.

Oh God. How many times do you think Ben made her watch each Matt Damon movie?

I thought the most harsh you could get with “Bless your heart” was to say it to someone’s face, but I was wrong; the true nuclear move is to say it to a reporter doing a Vanity Fair profile they will DEFINITELY read

If you can find Butter, watch that. It's a small movie about butter sculpting and small town/state politics. It's pretty funny and she's great as an ambitious wife.

She dropped “Bless his heart.”