is she presenting? Is it mating season in the Gifford household?

The exact same thing. My only saving grace is that even 15-year-old me was juuuuuuuuuust smart enough to have the presence of mind to not take a photo with my face in view.

I had pretty nice tits at 14 I’ll be honest.

Look,

Has the show definitely been cancelled then? I hear “hiatus” and “temporarily shelved” but I haven’t heard WE CANCELLED THE GODDAMN SHOW BECAUSE THIS WHOLE THING AND THESE PEOPLE ARE A NIGHTMARE. That’s what I’m waiting for.

So, what we’re saying is that it’s absolutely not ok for anybody to have a sense of humor about their job. Great. People do realize that it’s ok to laugh still, right? Hello? Right?

I’ve got about a dozen stories that I could share - including sitting w a client at dim sum as he toothpicked himself [horror] or the time I ate a pound or two of shrimp not knowing I needed to peel them - but here’s the one to beat yours. It’s unlikely anyone will read this post, but so be it. Didn’t happen to me,…

this sounds worse than when I Febreezed my armpit, which SUCKED.

As a kid I was taught it was polite to eat everything your host puts in front of you. On a family trip to Boston when I was nine, I think, we went to a nice restaurant. The kind of place with great service. I drank a glass of water, and somebody was immediately there to refill it. I dutifully drained it. And it was…

Worst: Flying to Maui for six hours while 3 triplets cried. The mom tried rocking them in the aisle and they kicked me in the head over and over. On the way back, a woman in front of me got more and more drunk and started shouting about politics and religion and staggering to the bathroom every couple of minutes.

Best:…

I made internet friends with one of the Muppets puppeteers who kindly agreed to sign a movie poster for me...on a whim I asked if a set visit to Pinewood studios in London (where I have a number of friends) was possible...I expected a “no” and instead was surprised to find an approval from a Disney VP for my visit.

It was the weirdest thing: Someone moved like 50 bushels of onions into my apartment while this was playing. Bastards.

Comments about late night shows inevitably include “eh I don’t find that particular show funny I prefer another” but when you watch this montage and realize that even if you weren’t a regular viewer that on over 6000 separate nights Dave brought a little joy to the world and maybe you only ever had one laugh at…

Late Night Show Hosts Ranked.

I consider myself a very rational, levelheaded person, but by the end of that Top 10 list I was about 30% convinced Andy Kaufman was going to deliver number 1.

There are two types of things in my universe: things in my pockets and things that are lost.

I didn’t speak to my dad for three years. He was a real piece of work when I was growing up, so taking a break might well have been good for the both of us. Eventually, we reconciled to the point at which we could converse, maybe once a month, maybe less, maybe more. But it wasn’t until it was too late that I realized…

I think Episcopalians are probably the sanest - they ordain women, celebrate gay marriages, don’t usually poke their heads into abortion debates, and (BONUS) don’t appear to actively protect pedophiles, unlike many Catholics.

You know, quite frequently when something like this comes up, or some Paula Deen-esque persona of the South says something insane, it is typically followed up with comments on “that backward south,” confederate flags, deep fried butter, ignorant baptists, etc... Which I think is more revealing of an ongoing desire for…

As another black woman, I must agree. I’m also curious about why they never include a map showing that Southern states also now hold a majority of the country’s black population. I mean, after all, it’s about shitting on them, too, no? Typically, in the name of decrying racism both systemic and personally mediated?