“5 Kobes” sounds like a secret drug deal code.

I’m a Kobe fan but I have to remind a lot of people of this exact statement (and the fact that Kobe’s lawyers revealed the girls name like 10 times after the judge explicitly told them now to, leading to the media frenzy around her personal life).

He used a fact and not a racist dogwhistle. Ought to bump Kobe a few places just for the effort.

Counterpoint: Your Scalding Hot Take™️ is terrible.

I wouldn’t worry too much about the injured. In my experience, there are plenty of Chinese spare ribs to go around.

Somebody went shopping... look at that nice plastic hair

That is what I thought, but wasn’t sure. The closest I have come to something like that was sitting in a hangar at Howard AFB and (what I thought was) discreetly taking pics of the Spookies on the flight line by pointing camera in general direction of flight line and snapping a photo. Suddenly about 5 Air Force MPs…

No, I’m worse than that. I’m a centrist who peddles in late night ironic juxtaposition. CAN YOU IMAGINE?

Really, you just need to look at his background to see where this stuff comes from:

Good morning sir, do you have a few moments to talk about our lord and savior, bacon fat?

they go further and do more damage if you freeze them before you throw them.

First thing I though was this douche was going to be paraded out as avictim of the PC liberal media.  Didnt think to elevate him to a cabinet position.   Will he only be acting or eventually Senate confirmed

I was hoping for Tituss Burgess :( 

I should probably warn you that Caleb Vatore, the vampire you hired, is heavily implied to be bi in the Vampires launch trailer, and he’s fully capable of going out in the sun and eating, unlike his neighbor Vlad. So he might sample the stock after all. At least he won’t umm ... drain the stock, since he has the Good…

I heard subway had one too, until Jared got caught.

But can you say for sure that your favorite café doesn’t have a sex dungeon?

That header image looks like Jimmy Kimmel just told him that someone won his money.

I keep picturing him with his head in a jar a la Futurama.

I have to agree — he was the Dick Cheney of his time (as was a young Dick Cheney, LOL). Plus that picture of him embodies “Ancient War Goblin”!

Obligatory Anthony Bourdain quote regarding Henry Kissinger: