Pretty sure that's the "Greg, you and I both know about the secret bank account where you've been stashing money for three years in anticipation of leaving your wife, my client, for your secretary who is 20 years younger than you and whom we also have pictures of banging your brains out in the Home Depot parking lot…

I've got a wide, long nose, a startlingly crooked smile, and Jack Nicholson's eyebrows.

I was made fun of about my lips so much growing up that I cried CRIED in 7th grade when a weird girl came over to me (apropos of nothing) and said my lips were cool because they weren't full of lines. WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?!? But I was so excited not to hear a slur about my lips I cried happy, relieved tears.

If you someone beats your child nearly to death and you choose not to take them to the hospital, you should have your kids taken away. At some point it is more about the kid than it is about you, and I'm okay drawing that line at when the child is critically injured, especially by someone the parent invites into the…

No. She would not have given up her children if she thought it would be socially accepted. That isn't real.

People would know, they would judge her, she would be a "bad mother".

If you're afraid you're doing something that's going to get your kids taken away from you, then you should probably have your kids taken away from you.

Yeah, this is totally about shaming and not the BF being a monster or the mother being a coward.

I read more than half of this and still didn't understand why people are mad. Can someone fill me in? I just can't read anymore while constantly asking myself "but why are people so angry?"

Miko: This is like putting these players through 2 car crashes a week! They don't care about the players, they care about the money!

She's a goddess.

Goldie Hawn is damn near 70 years old. She looks great.

I don't always wear khakis, but when I do, I wear Wal-Mart. Stay Khaki, my friends.

Imagine running into this in a dark alley.

If you can stomach her word salad, Ana Marie Cox has a transcript.
She obviously can't afford speechwriters anymore.

From the last reporting period, she took in $56k, and spent $118k. It's been following that trend for a while.

She thinks she has enough support to even get into the primaries? She doesn't even have a dog to stand on.

Buy STIHL, if you want a saw or any other outdoor power equipment buy STIHL.

Betting the 12th ball is the one used on special teams, because making sure that one's inflated properly would ensure better distance on kickoffs, punts and field goals/extra points.

I'd definitely be interested in reading peer-reviewed research on how in-patient drug rehab involving fucking horses is "hugely successful" for people who have succumbed to the temptations and sorrows of marihuana.